Act
by Sanni-O
Summary: ZoSan AU / After winning an underground battle Zoro left the city for two years to be trained by Mihawk. When he returns he finds his apartment being inhabitated by somebody else. It could have been worse, though. Due to a severe misunderstanding, his life still turns upside down, while Luffy has a another big suprise up his sleeve and evil is never too far away.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One - Prologue**

The noise around him was deafening. Shouts and cheers erupted from the crowd as his opponent started swaying and finally crashed onto the floor. Zoro had won once again. Now only two opponents were left between him and his aim-Dracule Mihawk-the world's greatest swordsman.

Looking down on Ryuma's blood drenched body Zoro searched for signs of life on him.

Killing your opponent was strictly forbidden in underground cage fights and would be severely punished, since nothing but trouble came from getting rid of dead bodies-even if you were a _shichibukai_ just like the host of these battles and today's special guest. Both of them were head of one of the seven Mafia families which were holding the world in their grasp. Nonetheless, it didn't mean that they would not turn to drastic measures immediately if they were publicly disobeyed. Being banned from ever setting foot in here was therefore just the tip of the iceberg of measures possible. But exactly that iceberg was hovering over Zoro now. He couldn't afford being banned. Not when he was so close to reaching his aim. When he was so close to Mihawk.

He practically willed Ryuma to breathe and a wave of relief floated through him as soon as the other man clenched his fist and rolled on his back gasping for air.

"The Demon Cutter won the third round of today's battles and therefore takes place in the finals!" announced the so called referee whose job it was to see whether the only two rules were being obeyed: Fights were one on one, no matter what; and no killing. Easy enough rules for the most retarded brute to remember and obey.

Zoro wiped the blood from his katanas' blades and sheathed them. The slight clank of metal on metal sounded through the cage while the adrenaline in his blood subsided way too quickly and left him with a furious pounding in his side. He couldn't afford to have gotten injured more than he had already been before this very fight had started. The minor cuts and quite heavy bruises he had gotten during his three fights weren't worth bothering about them; but this felt different. Worse. He shrugged it off.

Tonight was his night. It had to be.

Making his way out of the cage he was welcomed by even louder cheers and applause. There was a mixture of respect and fear on the spectators' faces but it all didn't matter to him. All that mattered were Mihawk's eyes watching his every move since he had entered this tournament.

An arm was laid around his shoulders, resting heavily on them and directing him through the crowd right back to the fighters' waiting area. Zoro didn't bother to look up, he knew Kid was just there so the people wouldn't stand in his way when he was trying to get to the waiting lounge-and because Kid had the crazy idea Zoro could get lost on his way there. It was ridiculous but politeness was written in big letters here, even though it ended when entering the cage. Thus Trafalgar Law, host of the Supernova underground battle scene in Grand Line City, insisted on everyone entering these holy halls obeying his "wish" for courtesy and Kid was the one to enforce his wish.

He was one fearsome hulk of a man-if not for his frighteningly gaudy outfits then for his disturbingly creepy grin promising murder and mayhem to whoever dared to cross his path. Still, Zoro had never seen him being rude or just raising his voice during tournaments. He honestly took all this courtesy shit way too serious.

"Nice fight," Kid said when they had reached their rather quiet destination. Zoro's ears had started ringing from all the screaming around him and finally he turned to face him. The red-haired hulk grinned at him, baring his marvellous teeth. He somehow reminded Zoro of a hyena.

"Did you expect anything else?" Zoro asked and cocked an eyebrow at him.

"But of course not," Kid replied jovially and turned to face the other two fighters in the waiting lounge. Except for Zoro those were the last fighters capable of winning this match. One of them would be his last obstacle. Their fight would be next and then Zoro would be facing the winner and show him where his place was. There was no way in hell he would lose to either of them.

"Ten minutes until your fight. Better get ready," Kid said and left.

Zoro exhaled. Tonight things would end differently than how they had ended a year ago when Mihawk had defeated him. Tonight he would prove that he was worth Mihawk's while; that he was worth fighting him again. A lighter clicked right next to him. He turned around to face the so called Mr Prince who was casually lighting his cigarette and looking at him with slight disgust. Mr Prince sure was a stupid name for a fighter. Still it fit this strange guy and his posh black suit. It was beyond Zoro why anyone in his right mind would show up for a tournament in a freaking suit but it didn't change the fact that the other man had. The guy stood there in all his glory, smoking a cigarette as if he didn't have a care in the world. The most striking thing about him were his yellow sunglasses. They were ridiculous and for most people it would have been more than just a little dangerous to fight wearing glasses. Nonetheless, Zoro had to admit that this guy's fighting style was extraordinary and close to being flawless. That much credit he could give him.

"What do you want?" he snapped and brushed past the guy to sit down on one of the armchairs provided for them.

"You should bandage that," Mr Prince replied pointing his cigarette at Zoro's side, causing him to look down his chest.

Looking down he found the heavy pounding beneath his ribcage to be caused by a deep cut which was bleeding quite profusely. Not enough to get Zoro worried but enough to affect him sooner or later if he didn't do something about it. Luckily, their host had been far-sighted enough to put a first aid kit in their lounge.

"Damn," he hissed and got up again to get a bandage.

"Don't expect me to show mercy to you in our fight later, boy" Absalom, an utterly flashy guy with a huge blonde mane and a lion-like face spoke up to Zoro.

When Zoro shot him a short glance he wondered again how anyone in his right mind would wear something as flashy as he did for an underground fight. He wore loud blue pants, a white button-down shirt with black crosses on it and a more than unnecessary black coat as well as a super ridiculous huge white and blue hat. It was gruesome. On the other hand, it fit the appearance of Mr Prince perfectly. Their fight sure as hell was going to be interesting. Zoro didn't know how the two of them had done it so far but their getups were still almost unstained while he was already dressed in tatters.

"What makes you think you are going to fight him?" Mr Prince asked him with a frown and almost childlike curiosity.

"Oh, come on, blonie. Just look at you. I am everything you could ever want to be. I'm not the most handsome ladies' man for nothing. All the girls here will just straight out fall into my lap after I've dealt with the two of you. And you, Mr Prince? You are just a skinny prick. I could never lose to you," Absalom snarled, self-confidence pouring out of every pore of his body.

"Treating ladies not as the ethereal beings they are is not something I can allow you, asshole," Mr Prince said quietly and cracked a smile. It was almost invisible but Zoro saw it nonetheless. It was just as murderous as Kid's, just more refined. Zoro was beginning to look forward to fighting this guy. He didn't doubt his victory for a second after having seen both of them fight. Absalom's speed was making him nearly invisible but that was all there was to it. The Prince was at an advantage when it came to everything else. He had the force behind his attacks, he had the speed to match Absalom and he had the better technique, as far as Zoro could judge from their previous fights. The lion-like idiot would eat his words in a couple of minutes; Zoro was sure of that.

"Anyway," the Prince added and directed his attention back to Zoro and took the bandage and wound dressing from his hand without giving him a chance to resist. "Take off your shirt."

Zoro didn't. He just glared at the other man from under his bandana, trying to look as irritated as he was. He didn't need help.

"I'm trying to save your grace here. Imagine how ridiculous you'll look trying to wrap that shit around your chest by yourself. Accept my help or I'll force you to," he insisted when he noticed Zoro's refusal.

"Fuck you," Zoro grunted and lifted his shirt far enough to expose the cut and half his chest. Like hell he would take off his shirt.

"I'm just trying to help myself. I can't fight you when you are dead, you know?"

"That's stupid."

"I don't care. Do you have a better reason for fighting here?"

It was a strange question to Zoro. Of course he had a ton of better reasons but why would anyone give a shit about knowing them?

"None of your bloody business," he therefore replied.

"If this isn't love I don't know what it might be," Kid teased as he returned to pick up the fighters for their match and for the first time Zoro could see something like real amusement glistening in the red-head's eyes. It was just as scary as every other expression on Kid's face.

"Now, Mr Prince, get your shit done and fight. After that you can fumble him to your heart's content," Kid rushed and then faced Absalom. "Absalom, I'd be delighted if you cared to follow us," he added and it was obvious that he didn't really like that Absalom guy. Sure, he didn't like anybody else either but he usually didn't show it to this extent. Based on that premise, it didn't really bother Zoro that Kid was actually mocking him and Mr Prince. On the contrary, it was so highly unusual he didn't know how to react, so he decided on ignoring it.

Mr Prince finished bandaging him without the slightest bit of haste and pulled down Zoro's shirt. Lighting another cigarette he went over to Kid and left with him and Absalom without saying another word. Nothing would have betrayed his seething if Zoro hadn't felt the difference in his touch as soon as Kid had shown up. He had tensed and pulled at the bandage rougher than necessary. Zoro couldn't make sense of it.

Sitting down in the armchair again Zoro noticed how much better he already felt after having gotten the bandage tied around his chest. The pounding in his side had numbed and anticipation of his fight did the rest for him, he had already forgotten the pain when the fight of Mr Prince and Absalom began.

The raw power radiating from the cage was enough to make his neck tingle. The tension in the air was almost tangible and when the gong rang and initiated the fight, the crowd started roaring with excitement.

Absalom was the first to launch at Mr Prince. Zoro knew the fight was over the instant Absalom moved. Making the first move onto an unknown opponent could be wise to test his strength but in this case, it was not. Mr Prince had been angry when he had entered the cage and was therefore unpredictable at the moment. Zoro would have waited for him to make a move to be sure he was calm enough to act at least a little reasonable or mad enough to make mistakes.

Absalom launched a kick at Prince's head but he flipped back and spun on his hands sweeping Absalom of his feet out of the same movement. ***** The blond hulk crashed into the floor roaring like a wounded animal. The crowd erupted in jeers and cheers.

Mr Prince lit another cigarette and blew out the smoke lazily.

"Is that all you've got?" he asked mockingly and shoved his hands into his pockets to emphasize his boredom. And then things got ugly.

Absalom moved so fast Zoro almost couldn't see him anymore. He kicked Mr Prince so quickly and with a vengeance Zoro wouldn't have thought he was capable of. Mr Prince didn't stand a chance to defend himself from the forceful attacks and was sent flying only a moment later. He hit the bars but instead of going down he somehow managed to use the momentum to launch himself back at Absalom, his knee forcefully connecting with his jaw. The noise in the room was almost deafening by now.

Absalom grabbed Mr Prince's leg and slammed him into the floor before he viciously stomped on his back and kicked his head. Blood started flowing from Mr Prince's lips and forehead, slowly covering his face and trickling on his blue shirt when he got on his knees and glared up at Absalom.

"Is that all you've got?" Absalom mocked and grinned. "Maybe we should up the ante. I bet you have a beautiful girlfriend who is already sick of you and looking for a real man. How about I make her my bride after this fight? Winner takes it all, don't you agree, scum? Oh, you look irritated." An amused grin spread on Absalom's face.

Mr Prince rose to his feet and lit another cigarette before he replied: "Did you say I was irritated? I'm far beyond that. I'm about to explode because of my anger!"

Still, he didn't do anything to block the vicious kick of Absalom directed at his kidney. He sank to his knees coughing blood while Absalom's malicious laughter echoed from the walls of the hall.

"You damn bastard!" the Prince yelled and shot up from his knees faster than anything Zoro had ever seen before. Whatever he did, he did it so fast Zoro couldn't really see it. Absalom was suddenly flying through the air and hitting the metal bars of the cage so hard they bent.

He slumped to the floor of the cage unconscious, blood gushing from his nose.

The crowd went silent in shock from the sheer force of Mr Prince's attack. Then they cheered and shouted in joy and celebrated Mr Prince like they had never seen anyone winning a fight before. It was annoying how fickle spectators could be. Still, Zoro had to admit the fight had been more than intriguing.

He was really looking forward to fighting the other man himself. Leaning back in his armchair he was going through everything he had witnessed just now to see where the weak spots of Mr Prince's attacks were. Obviously he was focused on his legs, so naturally his weak spot must be his arms and hands. Zoro was sure he would come up with something sufficient when the time was right.

When Mr Prince came back to the lounge he looked quite relaxed again. His shirt was bloodstained by now but apart from that and the already dried blood on his face he was not really injured. Good for him. He would need his strength in a couple of minutes.

"I can't believe this shitty bastard ruined my favourite shirt," he hissed and glared at Zoro. "I guess your bad luck is rubbing off on me, shitty swordsman."

Zoro raised an eyebrow at him. Why the hell would it be his fault now that the idiot wore expensive stuff to an underground fight?

"Now, tell me why you are doing this. I think I deserve at least that much as compensation."

"No."

"Oh, come on. There must be a reason why you are willing to fight a shitty mutant ape after fighting me. Given the fact that you beat me."

Zoro was slowly but surely getting fed up. Law and Kid were not his friends but they were paying him his fair share of stakes. Cash. Every time he came here to fight and, of course, win. Wasn't that enough of a reason anyone could think of? So far he had been a safe investment for them and tonight it wouldn't be different. He couldn't afford to lose, even though he didn't need the money.

He still didn't know how it had happened but one night a guy named Shanks had shown up here and offered to manage Zoro and promote him to be the next kendo champion. Legal work, tailor-made for him and fairly paid. Zoro would have refused him, if not his best friend Luffy had been with the guy. No one could refuse Luffy anything and Luffy had practically begged Zoro to become the coolest guy in the world. Who could have said no to that?

A smile tugged at the corners of his lips. It was a shame how weak he was when it came to his friends.

But, being a kendo champion didn't mean you didn't want to seriously kick some butt and he had never promised not to come here again. When Law had informed him that Mihawk would be here tonight he had left all reason behind and practically run here to finally be able to prove he was worth being recognised by the world's best swordfighter. The real champion, if there was anything like that among the real deal of swordsmen.

"You are not here for the money, that much is for certain. So why?" Mr Prince stated and exhaled a cloud of smoke in Zoro's face. The persistence of the other man was affecting Zoro and the fact that he was not hostile but honestly interested. Something in the way he interacted with Zoro pleased the swordsman to an extent he didn't understand while it annoyed the hell out of him at the same time.

"Mihawk," he answered taciturn and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Now leave me alone I have a fight to focus on."

Mr Prince seemed satisfied with his answer but that didn't keep him from babbling on.

"So you want to be the best swordsman one day?" Zoro just glared at him. "Of course you want to be the best. That was a stupid question, sorry."

"All lovey-dovey again, I see," Kid interrupted them and grinned wickedly. "You ready for the showdown?"

When he entered the cage again his blood was immediately boiling with adrenaline. He turned to face his opponent and couldn't stop himself from admiring him for the relaxed confidence he emitted. Zoro unsheathed his swords, put Wado's hilt in his mouth and took his fighting stance. This was going to be an amazing fight he wouldn't forget anytime soon. The gong rang and the crowd started cheering again.

Neither Zoro nor Mr Prince moved. They kept surveying each other and Zoro pondered where to place his first strike. Both of them weren't into making the first move but standing there doing nothing wouldn't take them anywhere, Zoro mused. As if someone had flipped a switch both men launched themselves at each other. The sheer force of their clash was overwhelming, still Zoro's attack was neatly blocked by Mr Prince's shin. No one had ever done anything bold and reckless like that before and Zoro was glad he always used the back of his swords to strike. A wild smile spread on his lips.

Before he knew what was going on Mr Prince bent backwards and the heel of his shoe connected with Zoro's jaw, sending him flying backwards. Tensing his muscles he flipped in the air and landed with his feet against a metal bar, thrusting off it and hurtling towards the other again. He was kicked in the neck again but this time he was prepared for it and didn't even flinch but let Sandai Kitetsu slip from his grasp and gripped the leg tightly.

"What will you do now?" he growled and was surprised to see the other man grin at him.

"This," he said and Zoro could feel him shifting his weight to the foot he was holding and doing a vertical spin, connecting his other foot with Zoro's head, throwing him over. It was a miracle Mr Prince had managed to not have his foot cut off or at least pierced by Wado which was still resting in Zoro's mouth. Zoro was rendered speechless and couldn't stop himself from smiling evilly. It was time to get serious. He rose to his feet and picked up Sandai Kitetsu before he faced his opponent again.

"Ready for getting serious?" he asked and got a bright smile as an answer.

"So you were holding back, shitty marimo. I knew it," Mr Prince replied and did something Zoro would never have expected. He declared his defeat.

"I surrender!" he exclaimed and the crowd fell silent. Zoro wasn't sure if something like that had ever happened before but it felt wrong on a fundamental level.

"Don't you dare!" Zoro yelled, fury striking him but there was nothing he could do. Rules were rules and attacking a defeated opponent was forbidden. Damn it!

"This is not over!"

"It is and there's nothing you can do about it. So don't disappoint me and do something stupid like losing to that ugly ape, got it?" he said and was a moment later out of the cage. Zoro felt betrayed. This was in no way a win he could accept. He stood there, his hands gripping his swords so tight his knuckles turned white. He was as furious as never before in his life.

Kid entered the cage and looked at him with a mixture of curiosity and mild humour.

"Don't be disappointed. Lovers come and go," he teased and Zoro was close to forgetting his manners. He was sure if he added just a little more pressure he would bite through the hilt of Wado or break all his teeth.

"Fuck you, Kid," he finally growled and Kid burst into laughter.

"Do you need a break or do you want to enter into the fight with the humandrill right away?" he asked after having calmed down again.

"I don't need a break," Zoro simply said and waited for what was about to come.

"The rules for this fight are different," Kid explained, "You are allowed to kill the humandrill if need be. Furthermore, the humandrill will be wielding weapons as well. I don't think this fight will take long but I wish you luck, Zoro."

Zoro just nodded. He had always trusted in his luck and tonight it wouldn't be any different.

The crowd fell silent when the cage with the giant baboon was moved over to the cage where Zoro waited for his opponent in. The animal looked wild and really fierce. It's teeth were huge and it actually wore armour including a sword. Zoro had known this wouldn't be easy but facing a baboon soldier was weird in itself no matter how good or bad the creature would be fighting. When it entered the cage it didn't make a sound. It was creepy to see this huge figure move with a grace Zoro knew he had seen before. Something about it was definitely odd.

Zoro knew it wasn't the best move in his life but he would open the fight. He launched at the striking for its head but it flipped back and spun on his hands to sweep Zoro of his feet out of the same movement. It was a move Mr Prince had used earlier. Zoro instantly recognised that but couldn't to anything to avoid the collision of the ape's feet and his face. He was sent flying through the cage and hit the bars. The beast was also as quick as Absalom had been and before Zoro knew what was going on he was hit by a wave of forceful kicks and hits he didn't stand a chance to defend himself from. He could feel his ribs crack when he crashed into the bars opposite the one's he had just been thrown against. This would get really ugly if he didn't move quickly. He felt blood running down his face and anger welled up inside him. Being thrown around like a doll was more of a disgrace than he could handle. Breathing became unexpectedly hard and when he coughed he spat blood.

"How can you be so content to copy somebody else's skills? Don't mess with me!" he yelled. ******

The humandrill launched at Zoro utterly unimpressed. It used the move Ryuma had before Zoro had struck him down. Mimicking others would be the downfall of this creature. Having defeated Ryuma with his standard three sword style he guessed within not even half a second that it wouldn't help him here. But he knew exactly what to do. He dropped his swords except for Shusui and launched himself at the beast. Their blades collided with such force, the sheer impact broke the humandrill's sword's blade and swiped the beast off its feet. The crowd erupted in cheers.

What happened then was something Zoro would never have expected. The humandrill climbed along the bars to pass Zoro by and tried to get a hold of his swords.

"Don't you dare!" Zoro yelled but he could already see Wado in the beast's hand. With full force he jumped forward and Shusui sunk to the hilt in the beast's chest.

The fight was over when the beast fell backwards to the floor, Wado sliding from its hand.

"I told you not to touch it," Zoro stated and collected his swords to sheathe them, Shusui singing in his hand with satisfaction.

He made it do the door of the cage before his legs gave way under him and he fell to his knees, throwing up blood.

"Zoro, you alright, man?" Kid asked and offered him an arm to hold on but Zoro refused his help. He was going to face Mihawk not like a cripple. He would stand tall and look him in the eye without even flinching.

"Nothing to get agitated over. Just minor bruises," he said and Kid nodded in appreciation before he silently guarded his way towards Mihawk.

"Roronoa Zoro," Mihawk greeted him and Zoro knew what he had to do. He cast aside his pride and knelt down before Mihawk, bowing his head.

"I'm begging you. Please, train me in the ways of the sword!" *******

* The figh of Absalom and Mr Prince is very very close to the actual fight they had in the series. I do not own any rights regarding the idea behind their actions or dialogues during this fight.

**Parts of the fight between Zoro and the humandrill are also taken from the series/manga. I do not own any rights regarding them either.

*** This sentence was also taken from the manga.

Everything taken from the series/manga was to make the story more realistic and to worship Eiichiro Oda - because there are things you just can't improve.

Thank you for reading this Prologue. I am looking forward to reading your reviews on it so I can see where to improve my writing. I hope you enjoyed this so far. :)

Yours

Sanni-O


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two - Two years later**

It had been two years. Two long years Zoro hadn't been home or had had a chance to contact his friends. Still he wasn't sure what date it exactly was. Mihawk had said he would train him for two years but he hadn't told Zoro how long he had been unconscious after having won the underground battle. Zoro was sure it had been at least a couple of days but he hadn't asked. It hadn't mattered back then. But now it suddenly did. He couldn't really say why but it felt like he had forgotten something very important and knowing the date would help him fix it. But all he knew was that it was winter. The End of November maybe. Maybe not.

Standing in front of his apartment's door he suddenly felt a wave of adrenaline rush through his body. What if he didn't live here anymore? What if his landlady had rented his place to someone else because she couldn't afford to wait for his return without getting any rent paid? Makino was a lovely lady and he only hoped he hadn't caused her too much trouble with his sudden absence. Not once in the past two years had he doubted his apartment would still be his when he came back, but now he was a little nervous.

He hadn't bothered to switch on the lights in the hall and suddenly he felt like a criminal pushing his key into the door lock of his home. Looking at the nameplate next to the door bell he could see his name still being carved into it, shimmering in the pale moonlight and a wave of relief washed over him. He turned the key to find that it still fit. Exhaling he noticed that he had been holding his breath.

Stepping inside his apartment he instantly noticed that something wasn't right. The smell was different from what he had expected it to be. The air inside was warm and rich with another smell he couldn't name right away and a soft yellow shimmer lit the apartment. Something was definitely wrong here. His apartment was supposed to be cold and empty.

He dropped his bag in the hallway and set his sword case down next to it before he slowly stepped down the hall towards the open kitchen and living room area.

Coming closer to the counter of the kitchen he could see that flowers were placed in a vase Zoro had never seen before, their blossoms were softly glowing in the yellow light which was radiating from somewhere. He couldn't make sense of it.

Entering the living room he was completely caught off guard by what he saw. A beautifully decorated and illuminated Christmas tree was standing right between the dining table and the couches in his living room, emitting the wonderful smell of fir needles. Now that he knew what the smell was it was obvious.

Mihawk hadn't been particularly fond of any kind of holiday so Zoro hadn't had a chance to get a hint that it was mid-December already. Obviously, back then he had been unconscious way longer than he had expected. Looking closer he noticed the nicely wrapped gifts underneath the Christmas tree, the ember of a dying fire in the chimney behind the dinning table on the right hand side of the loft-like room, and tons of photos gracing the walls, window sills, and the chimney piece.

He had never put pictures anywhere before but now that they were there he found he should have done so. It was nice to not just stare at blank walls.

Stepping closer to the Christmas tree he let his fingers run over the needles and fairy lights to make sure they were real. They were. So, judging by the still wrapped gifts, it was at least December 23rd. Damn. But why on Earth would there be a Christmas tree in his apartment and a dying fire in his chimney? It all made no sense to him.

"And here I thought Santa was a fatty with a shitty beard," a voice suddenly startled him. Zoro spun around and could see the silhouette of a man leaning against the door frame of the bedroom. Zoro's bedroom, God damn it. What the fuck?

"You have ten seconds to explain what you are doing in my apartment or I'll kick a hole in your shitty head," the man added. Unfortunately, Zoro couldn't see his face to be able to judge the sincerity behind his words. But he supposed it didn't happen often that somebody faced an alleged burglar without batting an eyelid. Furthermore, he sounded like he meant it. Still, this was Zoro's apartment, so if anyone was going to kick in heads it was him.

"This is _my_ apartment so you better explain what _you_ are doing here before I kick your sorry ass out of here," he growled. The other man pushed himself off the door frame and paced over to Zoro, his thumps were tucked into the waistband of his grey pyjama pants, his torso was covered with a dark blue T-shirt and showed enough defined muscle to prove that he was at least able to try and kick Zoro out. He grabbed cigarettes and matches from the couch table before he sat down on the arm rest of the couch, his eyes never losing focus on Zoro.

Finally, Zoro could see his face clearly in the light of the fairy lights of the Christmas tree. He was blonde, had rather long and messy hair gracing his head and a goatee which somehow gave him a touch of being French in Zoro's opinion. He didn't know anyone French, so this guy definitely had no reason to be here.

Zoro crossed his arms in front of his chest and waited for an explanation. If he had learned one thing over the last two years, it was to be patient. You couldn't rush Mihawk. It would get you nowhere. So, at least he could try and be patient in this situation as well.

"So, if that is true, what's your name?" the blonde asked coolly, lighting his cigarette.

Zoro clenched his fists and decided on answering the other's questions. Killing him would lead nowhere and he hadn't come back after two years to get himself imprisoned straight away. Calling his friends for the first time after so long shouldn't be about bailing him out. Also, he had fought enough over the last two years and wasn't keen on picking another fight just yet. All he wanted was to go to bed so he could finally sleep at home again and call his friends first thing in the morning to tell them he was back. "My name is Roronoa Zoro. You could see that damn well if you cared to take a look at the name plate next to the door bell."

The other man just smirked mischievously.

"Why don't you take a look at said name plate yourself instead, shit-head? We'll see what you say then."

Zoro wasn't sure what the other man was talking about. He had seen his name on the plate already, right before his key had unlocked the door of his apartment. But the sudden lack of hostility in the other's attitude was enough to make Zoro obey his request.

"Whatever," he groaned and went down the hallway to take another look at the name plate again. He heard that the blonde was following him. Most likely he would simply close the door as soon as Zoro was outside but that would be not really enough to stop him from getting back into the apartment. He would tear the door down if he had to, even if it just was to make a point.

Stepping out the door and turning to face the name plate he could read his name. Again. Oh, wonder.

"See?" he said. "Roronoa. That's definitely not you but me, now get your sorry ass out of my apartment."

"Sorry to disappoint you, but…" the other said and switched on the light in the hallway. Zoro's jaw dropped to the floor when he saw the rest of the name plate.

"Who the fuck is Jambenoir, and why is that name on my name plate? What freaking name is that anyway?" Zoro was far beyond not understanding any of what was going on here. It was absolutely ridiculous to have to discuss with someone who had nothing to do with him if he had the right to occupy his apartment or not, no matter what freaking shit was written on a name plate or not.

"It's French and means black leg, moron…," the blonde explained before he fell silent and frowned at Zoro, his eyes never leaving his face.

That was a strange name but not the most outlandish Zoro had ever come across. Still, it didn't explain a thing. Everybody could put his name on a name plate.

"Tell me why you are here!" Zoro simply snapped. He was pissed about the way this night was developing. All he had wanted was to sleep. Was that so hard to understand?

"That's a long story, Zoro. Why don't you come in and I'll brew you a cup of coffee while I tell you what happened?"

"Don't you dare invite me into my own apartment. Be glad I haven't kicked you out already. I didn't agree to anything so you have no right to be here," Zoro growled. Even if the other man didn't intend to, he pissed him off to no end. It was new to Zoro that being treated to a cup of coffee annoyed him, but still it was.

"That's partly true. So, would you care for a cup of coffee in _your_ apartment while I tell you the story?" the blonde asked again and looked at him in question.

Zoro didn't reply but just stepped inside and for a moment he considered slamming the door into the other's face. He didn't. For the moment he would be a man and deal with this shit like a grown up. Stay calm, listen to what this _Jambenoir_ guy had to say and try to deal with it. At least his apartment was still his apartment. Sharing it for one night wouldn't kill him.

He sat down at the counter and absentmindedly stared at the flowers which were gracing it. Why would a guy have flowers in his apartment? Why would anyone want to have flowers rotting in a vase in their apartment?

"I'm Sanji. If you care to know," the blonde said stepping into the kitchen. He filled water in the coffee machine and took a silver canister from the cabinet. Zoro watched him preparing the coffee. It felt weird to have a complete stranger in his kitchen behaving like he owned the place. But maybe he did own the place to some extent. Zoro hadn't been here for two years and most likely he should thank that guy-Sanji-that he hadn't thrown away all his belongings and changed the door locks. After all, he had left without saying a word and wasn't sure how his friends had taken his disappearance. Most likely they were mad at him for making them worry. At least Nami would be mad at him, and Chopper. God, Chopper must have been so worried when he had learned that he had left without saying a word. Luffy on the other hand would simply be happy to have him back. He would have to call Shanks as well. Damn. Now that he thought about it, leaving with Mihawk had most likely been one of his most idiotic decisions ever. He sighed.

"Are you not feeling well?" Sanji asked and the honest concern in his voice made Zoro frown. Hadn't the guy threatened to kick a hole in his head barely five minutes ago?

"It's nothing. There's just too much shit I'll have to deal with tomorrow."

"You won't be getting very far. Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, moron. Where have you been all this time if you don't even know that?"

"Tomorrow is the 24th?" Zoro asked dumbfounded as realisation finally hit him.

"Of course it is. And it's Chopper's birthday. They are coming over for dinner and his birthday party," Sanji explained and now it was his turn to frown at Zoro before he turned to get two cups for their coffee from the cupboard and filled them. "Do you want milk or sugar?"

"No." Zoro found his favourite cup placed in front of him and when he looked up at Sanji in surprise he found the other man smiling.

"Chopper told me he gave this cup to you as a birthday present, so I assumed you'd prefer it. Pink suits you."

"Shut up," Zoro growled and took a sip of his coffee. It was fantastic, most likely the best coffee he had ever tasted in his life. It also helped him relax a little. "I don't have a present for Chopper. Or anyone. I'm screwed. " Zoro was so overwhelmed by this discovery he missed the obvious explanation of this situation in Sanji's words.

Sanji left the kitchen and sat down next to him and pulled out another cigarette. Zoro just watched him from the corner of his eye and remained silent.

"Don't you think it would be enough to just tie a gift ribbon around your neck and say 'Surprise! I am back.'?" Sanji said. Realisation finally kicked in and Zoro was surprised he hadn't noticed earlier.

"The hell? You know Chopper?" he asked and nearly spilled his coffee when he whirled around to face the other man.

"Are you a complete moron? Of course I know him. I know all of your friends, because they are my friends as well!" Sanji snapped. "You must be really retarded to think Luffy would agree to let a complete stranger live in your apartment for God knows how long. Heavens, no one ever mentioned that you were this stupid, mosshead."

"Who are you calling stupid, stupid? You are a complete stranger to me!"

Sanji looked at him with a weird expression Zoro couldn't read.

"Right. I'm sorry. It's just that it doesn't feel like you're a stranger. After all I've known your friends and your apartment for quite a while now. Does that make sense?"

Zoro just stared at him deadpan while he tried to understand what Sanji was talking about. He couldn't. He had lived with Mihawk for two years without really getting an inch closer to understanding him, so why would someone he hadn't met before in his entire life feel familiar with him?

"Not for me," he finally said and took another sip of his coffee. "So, Luffy made you stay here then?" he asked to change the topic. That would explain a lot. Zoro should have thought about that possibility from the beginning. After all it was Luffy they were talking about.

"Yes, he did. Sort of. He talked to Shanks, Shanks talked to your landlady and here I am keeping your place warm and cosy."

"Why? Didn't you have a place to live before?" Doing a friend a favour was one thing but giving up his own apartment to live a complete stranger's just to keep it for him was nothing Zoro would do for anyone. It was stupid.

"A couple of days after you had left with Mihawk, Luffy came to the Baratie, the restaurant I worked at back then, and told me that he didn't know what to do since they couldn't afford keeping your apartment for you while waiting for your return. An hour later my shitty old man kicked me out of our apartment. He rambled something about me being a shitty nuisance and he didn't want me in his home anymore." Sanji smiled and exhaled a cloud of smoke. "He even threatened to kick me out of the restaurant if I dared to remain as shitty a cook as he thought I was. I am, well, was the sous chef there. The shitty geezer kicked me out of the restaurant after all. Funny, isn't it? After all I was supposed to pay rent after he had kicked me out and not having a job sure didn't serve the purpose."

Zoro knew he had heard the name of the restaurant before but couldn't remember when or why exactly. He scratched the back of his head and tried to think harder. The scar on his chest started itching and somehow he couldn't get rid of the thought that it was connected to hearing the name of the restaurant.

"You know, Luffy came to the Baratie quite frequently before you disappeared. I remember very well that you were with him once."

"I was?" Zoro perked up. So he did know Sanji already? That was unlikely.

"Yes, you were. You nearly got yourself killed in our parking lot, moron. How can you forget something like that? I don't think I will ever forget that day."

So there was the connection. Looking at Sanji he found him lost in his memories. As far as Zoro remembered it, it had been a fantastic day. True, he had lost to Mihawk but he had gained the approval of the older man back then. He had gained his respect and it had been the first step in the right direction. It had been the basis for the hard work and training he had undergone for the last three years and it had been one of the reasons why Mihawk had accepted to train him. The scar was nasty but it didn't bother him. Just like the loss of his eye didn't bother him. As long as he kept his arms to hold his swords he couldn't care less.

"What happened then?" Zoro asked and Sanji snapped out of his journey down memory lane.

"Luffy was so thrilled by my food that he decided I had to become his friend. For one year he tried to convince me that I had to become his exclusive cook and in the end he wanted me to join his crew. You know, the crew on the TV series he's starring in? Pirate King."

"No. I know he was planning to become the pirate king one day but I thought he meant it more… gangster like. Like the real Gol D. Roger."

Sanji's gaze darkened and suddenly he seemed to be really upset. He crushed his cigarette in an ashtray. Lighting another cigarette his mood seemed to darken even more. He rose to his feet, grabbed his cup and paced over to the couch.

"Why don't we talk in the living room? This story is getting longer than I expected and it's more comfortable there."

He slumped down in Zoro's favourite spot on the couch. Zoro growled. Having this cook guy here was getting harder by the minute.

"That's my place," he said grabbing his cup and went over to the couch as well.

"Oh really? You want me to scram then?" Sanji asked and his mood seemed to brighten again. Zoro nodded but the blonde shook his head in response. "Then make me, because it's my favourite spot as well," he said and Zoro could feel his pulse quicken with anger but he wouldn't give in to it. There was too much going on he had no idea about and he could beat up the shit-cook later as well.

"Fine," he snarled and sat down next to the cook. "Now talk."

Sanji leant back and puffed out a cloud of smoke.

"Luffy met the most beautiful lady I've ever seen in my life. Boa Hancock. Unfortunately, it was at the Baratie, so it was partly my own fault. I think it was the same night Zeff kicked me out of the restaurant."

Zoro noticed that Sanji seemed to be really upset about what had happened but he couldn't figure out why that could be. All he could do was to wait for the other man to continue his story and empty his cup of coffee. He placed it on the table and leant back against the familiar back of his couch. He was finally home again.

"She fell in love with him," Sanji said gravely and Zoro finally understood. He was jealous of Luffy. "I don't get it one bit but she still loves him more than anything in the world, even though he rejects her every time she proposes to him. He's not even trying to be nice, he just flat out tells her he won't marry her no matter what. I hate to watch it, but there's nothing I can do about it. And she seems to love him even more the blunter he is with her. It's pissing me off."

Zoro knew exactly what Sanji meant. Luffy could be very straight to the point. But it didn't surprise him that Luffy wasn't interested in Hancock however beautiful she might be. Luffy generally wasn't interested in love matters. Just like himself. But why would that change anything in Luffy's life?

"What's so special about her?" he therefore asked.

"She's a shichibukai. You should know what that is, " the cook explained and Zoro did. After all Mihawk was a shichibukai as well. One of the seven most notorious warlords under protection of the World Government. There really was no way to not know about them. He just nodded as an answer so he wouldn't interrupt Sanji's story. Now things were getting interesting.

"Well, Hancock obviously took a fancy on Luffy and therefore offered to help him achieve his dream. She's managing him now, even though he doesn't really want it. He said becoming the pirate king wasn't worth it if he couldn't do it on his own but I think a little help can't hurt. She therefore offered to sponsor him and here we are. He's part of a TV show the people go crazy about. Over the last two years Luffy became really famous. Still, this is just a legal cover for his plans on becoming the _real_ pirate king. I don't know how but he will manage to turn all of us into wanted criminals one day."

"Sounds pretty much like him."

"And that wasn't even the fun part of the story, yet."

Sanji shifted his position, tucked one leg up on the couch and leaned in closer to Zoro before he spoke again.

"At the Baratie everyone is served as long as they are hungry. No matter who they are. Therefore you sometimes eavesdrop on things not really meant for anyone's ears. So did I. A couple of shady guys were talking about underground battles taking place in a rundown building of the Galley-La Company. Well, one day I was bored out of my mind and decided to go there just to have a look. Somehow I ended up taking part and it was the shitty best thing I've ever experienced in my life. After you disappeared I had to tell Luffy about it. Honestly, I've been wondering why he hadn't known about it already." Sanji paused and looked at Zoro in question. When he didn't get a reaction he went on. "He has become notorious underground since then and made really interesting friends."

"What do you do for a living now?" Zoro asked changing the topic while he was processing the information given to him. He knew Luffy had always been into fighting but having him compete underground really wasn't what Zoro had had in mind for him. But it made good money. And paying the rent for two apartments wasn't a piece of cake. He knew his apartment was not the most expensive there was but it wasn't cheap either so social welfare wouldn't be enough to afford it. So it was only natural to want to know what his new _friend_ was doing for a living.

Much to his surprise Sanji fell silent. Biting his lower lip he seemed to ponder telling him or not. He must have gotten himself a really nasty job if he couldn't talk about it.

"I'll tell you another time," he finally said and looked really unhappy.

"You must be a really crappy cook if your new job's embarrassing enough you can't even talk about it."

"You haven't tried my cooking yet so hold your tongue. If you asked Luffy…"

"Luffy eats everything. He doesn't really give a shit about taste."

"Shut the fuck up, marimo!" Sanji hissed and kicked Zoro in the side. Immediately Zoro's interest was sparked by the sheer force of this kick. He could see the other was holding back but still held enough force to actually hurt Zoro. That was rare.

"When you say you fought underground, when was that?" he asked. It was a pity he hadn't been there to see it. Maybe he could make Sanji spar with him. When he could hold himself in an underground battle he should be fine facing Zoro for training.

"It was two years ago when Mihawk was there." Zoro didn't interrupt him but he somehow got a notion to where this would lead and his skin started tingling when he met the intense glare Sanji was directing at him. "You were there as well, you know?"

Zoro's entire body tensed .This story couldn't be true. He hadn't seen Sanji there. He remembered every fighter of the tournament no matter how their performance had been but Sanji definitely hadn't been there.

"You can't have been there. I would have seen you fight. I would remember you," he said and saw confusion crossing Sanji's features.

"It seems like your mossy brain isn't working properly. How the hell can you not remember me?" Sanji asked and frowned at Zoro.

"Curly-brow, there are some striking features about you that wouldn't have escaped my vision," Zoro demanded gesturing at the cook's curly eyebrows.

"Stop mocking my eyebrows, moss-head. At least my memory isn't as shitty as yours. You still owe me a shirt, you know?"

"A shirt? What the hell are you talking about?" For a moment Zoro thought he had it but now he was completely in the dark again. Why the hell would he owe the blonde a shirt?

A mischievous grin spread on Sanji's lips.

"You really don't remember? And here I thought my spectacular surrender would have offended you on some fundamental level."

Zoro sprang to his feet.

"That was you! You goddamn bastard! Never in my life have I met such an insolent idiot as you!"

Sanji just grinned on.

"So you do remember me. I had hoped so much you wouldn't get yourself killed so we could end our little fight. I was so going to kick your ass back then."

"Dream on. Why would you have surrendered if you had been able to do that?"

"Because it didn't want to get in the way of your dream just because I was bored. And I didn't really want to fight that incredibly ugly ape-thing. Watching you getting mauled and crushed by that beast was more than… unpleasant. There was one moment when I was sure you were dead-just to see you slicing up that beast. I guess your fighting skill is not as shitty as I thought."

Zoro took a deep breath. And another one. He counted from fifty backwards and when he reached zero he finally had calmed down again. He would not pick a fight in his apartment. All he needed was a good night's rest and everything would be fine again. He was not going to kill Sanji just because of being an insolent bastard. Maybe he would do so if he proved to still be a prick tomorrow but not now.

"I'm going to bed," he finally hissed and noticed how hard he had clenched his jaw to remain calm.

"Fine with me. I wanted to start preparing lunch, dinner and the cake about now anyway. I'll call everyone to be here at about 3 p.m. Is that okay for you?"

Zoro was surprised at how nice Sanji could be. He glanced at the clock on the wall just to find it was already 5 a.m. That would be about eight hours of sleep for him and more than enough time to take a shower.

He just nodded, got up and went to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Everything was still where it was supposed to be. He took a new toothbrush and toothpaste from the cupboard as well as a towel. He was so tired he moved as in a trance, brushed his teeth and washed his face, and paced over to his bedroom without thinking about it or noticing the strange look Sanji gave him. He stripped out of his clothes and slumped into bed. He was asleep barely a breath later.

X

Sanji didn't know what to do or think but he was getting the feeling that living here with Zoro would become a hassle for him.

Over and over he had imagined what his 'first meeting' with Zoro would be like - and none of his fantasies had been like this. Reality was so... disappointing. He had expected Zoro to be what? Grateful? Happy to see him? Sure, that would have been nice. A part of him had even expected to get kicked out of the apartment. But it hadn't happened. They simply had talked things over and Zoro was fine with what he had told him. Things were going smoothly but still Sanji's skin was tingling and his heart was beating a little too fast. He was nervous and didn't even know why.

He lit another cigarette, let his head slump against the backrest and stared at the ceiling, trying to ignore the noise Zoro made in the bathroom. When he paced over to the bedroom afterwards Sanji couldn't stop his gaze from following him. For a second he considered mentioning that he had been using Zoro's bed and the sheets needed to be changed for him. He even thought about suggesting that Zoro might prefer using the guest room for tonight but he let the thoughts slip. He didn't feel like changing bed sheets right now and sharing a bed wasn't something to kill yourself over.

Thinking about work, he wondered if he should at least wash Zoro's clothes before baking Chopper's cake and preparing lunch and dinner. He got up, switched on the light in the kitchen area and paced over to Zoro's bag in the hallway to check if the clothes inside needed to be washed. Of course Zoro would kill him for sniffing around in his bag later but he didn't care. Surprisingly, everything inside the bag was freshly washed and neatly folded. Inside the case next to Zoro's bag he found Zoro's swords. They were just as beautiful as he remembered them to be and they looked like they hadn't been used at all. Zoro sure took care of them perfectly.

Sanji sighed and took the bag as well as the case to the bedroom. Zoro hadn't even bothered to close the door so Sanji could enter without disturbing him too much.

Zoro lay there snoring softly, already sleeping soundly. Taking a closer look at him Sanji found him with his face deeply burrowed into the pillow, a slight frown on his face.

Sanji smiled and left the room plucking Zoro's shed clothes from the floor to put them in the laundry box in the bathroom.

Closing the door behind his back he realised one thing: he was glad Zoro was back.

"This is stupid," he mumbled and went over to the kitchen to make Chopper's birthday cake. A huge chocolate cake it would be.

Sanji loved baking, even though his true forte was cooking. It was always nice to be able to surprise his lovely ladies with new sweets and fancy drinks. Their smiles were all he cared about. And Chopper's of course.

Baking absorbed his entire attention and when he took a look at the clock again after finishing the decorating the cake's topping he saw that it was already eight o'clock. He had absolutely no idea how it could have taken him only three hours to create this masterpiece of a pink winter wonderland birthday cake. It was high time to call Chopper and congratulate him. Most likely he would be at work regardless of today being Christmas and his birthday. The boy was just too nice for his own good. He took his cell from the counter, flicked through the phone book and finally dialled Chopper's number. It rang four times before Chopper picked up.

"Sanji! Good morning," he chirped happily.

"Good morning and happy birthday, Chopper. You are in such high spirits this early in the morning?"

"Don't think it makes me happy that you are the first to call, idiot. I'm getting ready to head home from work. I'm so looking forward to visiting you later!"

Sanji smiled. Chopper was such a sweet kid and he doubted it would ever change, no matter how old he would get. He pulled out his cigarettes and lit up another one.

"I have a great surprise for all of you and therefore I need you to come over earlier than planned. You think that's possible?"

Chopper fell silent for a moment.

"I hate surprises the most, asshole!" he exclaimed in a happy sing-song . "When shall I be there?"

"Three p.m., I'll tell the others as well."

"I'll be there. Thank you, Sanji."

"You're welcome. Now hurry and get home. Make sure you sleep a little before you get here."

"I will. See you later."

Chopper hung up and Sanji was ready to burst with joy, like he always was after talking to their doctor.

He pulled the coffee container from the cupboard to brew himself another cup of coffee as his cell rang. Looking at the caller-ID he frowned. It was his ex-boss Emporio Ivankov.

"What the fuck do you want from me?" he snapped after taking the call.

"Vyou are in a really bad mood this early in the morning. What's bothering vyou, candy-boy?" Ivankov asked.

"It's you!" Sanji snapped and was close to smashing his phone against the wall. "I won your shitty challenge so our contract terminated at midnight! I'm a free man now so don't call me anymore!"

"That's no way to talk to a lady, Vi thought vyou learned at least that much during the last two years," Ivankov replied coolly. "Anyway, Vi just wanted to wish vyou happy Christmas and ask if vyou got my present."

"What present? I don't want anything as long as you are involved," Sanji hissed but then the doorbell rang and a cold shiver ran down his spine.

"Vi think vyour present arrived, candy-boy."

"Don't call me candy-boy, shitty drag-hag!" he yelled and went over to open the door. He knew something worse than death awaited him but he was a man, God damn it, and he would survive this just like had survived the last two years of hell. He had lost so much of his grandeur and dignity while working for Ivankov at his damned drag-joint he was sure nothing the guy could have up his sleeve could unsettle him. There was nothing left to shock him.

He had never been so wrong in his life.

"Happy Christmas, Sanji-kun!" Tibany and Caroline, Sanji's personal Christmas elves from hell, exclaimed holding mistletoe above his head. Their pseudo-sexy red Santa-dresses were only making things worse. He hadn't seen that coming and being fast in reaction simply wasn't enough to avoid the inevitable. Before he even knew what was going on he had their lips on his cheeks and the most vicious goosebumps of his entire life. He felt like throwing up and dying just to get out of this situation. He would never be able to get rid of this disgusting feeling of stubbles on his cheeks.

"Get the fuck out of here!" he yelled but it only made things worse.

"What the hell is going on here?" Zoro asked drowsily rubbing his eyes when he stepped into the hall only wearing underwear. That guy had some nerve to show his really nice body to those completely crazy drag-hags. But still they didn't stop to shock Sanji.

"Sanji-kun, who is this gorgeous eye-candy you have here?" Tibany asked and Sanji was a bit grateful Zoro had shown up. At least he had gotten rid of those freaks hanging all over his face.

"Kisses under mistletoe!" Caroline announced and she and Tibany were about to launch themselves at Zoro.

"Don't you dare touch him!" Sanji shouted before he realised what he was doing.

"I see you are having fun, candy-boy," Ivankov's voice sounded from the cell's speaker just loud enough to highlight the silence that had spread over the hallway. His unmistakable laughter sounded through the silence before he hung up. This was the worst.

Zoro, Tibany and Caroline simply stared at Sanji in utter confusion. Tibany and Caroline exchanged a tell-tale glance before they started devouring Zoro with their eyes again. It was disgusting.

"Would you please stop ogling him. It's disgusting," Sanji stated regaining his poise. Now he was sure nothing worse could happen. This day was becoming worse and worse, but he would manage to save it somehow. All he had to do was to get rid of his personal nightmares. He had learned a lot from them and their fighting skills were exquisite, but he despised them like nothing else on earth. Well, except for bugs maybe.

"But Sanji-kun, he's marvellous," Tibany stated as if that were a justification for sexually harassing people.

"Shut the fuck up and get the hell out of my apartment!" Sanji yelled and was close to grabbing their incredibly ugly dresses and throwing them out by force.

"What did I tell you last night, curly-brow? This is _my_ apartment," Zoro interrupted and Sanji saw the mischievous gleam in Tibany's and Caroline's eyes.

"So you are living with this sexpot?" Caroline asked.

"I should have known that you are into the rough type," Tibany mused. "Why else would you have refused all of my attempts to seduce you, Sanji-kun?"

"Because I hate your ugly...," Sanji hissed but Zoro interrupted him again.

"Ladies, could you please be a little quieter? I didn't get much sleep last night." He turned to leave but didn't get very far before Caroline stopped him, his arm stuck in her deathly grip.

"We didn't get our Christmas gift yet," she purred and to Sanji it sounded like the promise of torture and pain. He promised himself to move out of here as quickly as possible just to make sure they would never ever visit him again. Most likely he would have to hide at the end of the world but it would be worth it. Tibany's equally deathly grip locked around his arms and he was shoved in Zoro's direction.

"We still want our kisses under mistletoe. But since you have your sweetheart over, we will settle for watching you guys," Caroline announced and Sanji felt his blood run cold. He was sure Zoro didn't get their situation because he didn't react in the slightest. But Sanji knew only too well that even after two years of fighting them and fighting their shitty idea of turning him into one of them he knew that there was no way to escape without at least destroying half the apartment building. They were monsters when it came to fighting and he had the notion Zoro wouldn't be pleased to see his apartment being demolished.

Finally, when their chests were pressed together and mistletoe was held above their heads by Caroline Zoro seemed to realise what was going on. Most likely Sanji wouldn't need to move anymore when this was over. He would be dead before having had a chance to start preparing breakfast, let alone dinner. Fuck. Still, he knew it would be better to give them what they wanted. They wouldn't listen to his explanation anyway.

"Just bear with it," Sanji whispered before he closed the distance between them and tenderly brushed his lips against Zoro's. He had expected to be crept out by kissing another guy but he wasn't. He nearly choked though, when he felt Zoro's palm on his cheek pulling him even closer. His lips slid off Zoro's for a moment but it was enough for the other man to quietly growl, "This better be worth it," before Sanji was kissed as passionately as if they were fighting again.

Sanji felt Tibany's grip disappear when she clapped her hands in excitement and used the opportunity to wrap his arms around Zoro's neck. He didn't know why but he felt that if he didn't do it he would lose this fight. This was about controlling the situation and he would definitely not be dominated by the other man. This was his battle and he would win it.

The tip of his tongue slid over Zoro's lower lip and was instantly met by the other man's tongue. It was the same as kissing a woman but so very different at the same time it was sending shivers down Sanji's spine. It made him want to bite Zoro. He softly nipped on his lower lip and could feel Zoro grinning before he conquered his mouth again.

"Is it just me or is it getting hot in here?" Tibany asked.

"I think we should leave them alone before we witness something indecent," Caroline replied.

"It's a pity but I guess you are right. Have fun Sanji-kun and Sexy-kun."

"Oh, I am sure they will." Barely a moment later they were out of the door and Sanji wasn't sure if he should be relieved or disappointed that it was over already. He tangled his fingers in Zoro's hair and yanked them back, efficiently ending their kiss. Zoro hissed in pain and glared daggers at Sanji as soon as he had freed himself from his grasp.

"What's wrong with you, asshole?" he yelled and rubbed the back of his head where Sanji had almost ripped out his hair.

"I just didn't want you to enjoy this too much. This was a one time thing. I am very grateful you helped me out but that's it."

Zoro just crossed his arms in front of his chest and raised an eyebrow in question.

"You have a strange way of showing gratitude. Now tell me what was going on here. Who were those… freaks?"

Sanji paced over to the kitchen rubbing his face with his palms. Suddenly all the excitement he had felt before subsided and he felt tired as hell.

"Do you want breakfast?" he asked and lit up a cigarette.

"I want answers and then go back to bed again," Zoro stated and followed him but stopped at the counter to lean against it.

"I told you I didn't work at the Baratie anymore, didn't I?" Sanji began his explanation and waited for Zoro to react. When he nodded, he went on, "See, I worked for a guy called Emporio Ivankov for the last two years and I am more than grateful that our contract terminated last night. It was hell working for him since he's the queen of most likely the ugliest drag-queens you'll ever see in your life. And he himself is not a pretty one either. Just like the two you saw just now. As a man with a sense of fashion it offends me every time I see them." Sanji paused and shuddered as the images of the countless trannies he had had to face welled up in his memory. He squashed his cigarette in the ashtray and lit up another one right away. There was no way he would live this through without turning into a chain-smoker. And he would leave out all the embarrassing and disgracing parts of the story, that much was for sure.

"I hated every minute I spent with them. The deal was that Ivankov would teach me his, admittedly superb, attack cuisine if I was able to defeat his 99 masters of Newkama Kenpo-a shitty bunch of drag-queens using shitty fancy fighting styles. After every won fight I would get another recipe and enough money to pay the rent. I don't know exactly why Tibany and Caroline were here though."

"This blonde guy seemed to be quite into you," Zoro stated and Sanji shuddered. He knew exactly that Zoro was right and it surprised him a little how observant the other had been even though he had been half asleep. But he wouldn't admit that shitty horrid queers had tried to hit on him. More than once. He shuddered again.

"Why did they think I was your boyfriend?" Zoro asked coolly and caused Sanji to wonder why he himself was so cool about it. He was a ladies' man so why didn't it bother him to be considered gay by the queerest people there were? Maybe just because of that.

"Beats me," he said but he could admit to himself that being considered Zoro's boyfriend was not as offensive as being considered a possible lover for Tibany by these godforsaken trannies.

"Why didn't you just tell them I was not?"

"Listen, I don't expect you to understand it but I had to deal with their shitty way of thinking for two years. They wouldn't believe the truth even if their life depended on it. Honestly, giving them what they want was the only way to get rid of them without destroying half the building. They might not look it but they are incredibly strong and I didn't feel like ruining Christmas for more people than necessary."

"So I'm considered collateral damage?"

"Among the three options I had for kissing you are closest to a lady."

"Say that again," Zoro growled and Sanji realised his lapse. He hadn't meant it that way. Damn.

"I'm just talking about your face," he tried to make the best of a bad job but it didn't work. Zoro launched at him and punched him straight in the face. It didn't really surprise Sanji that it hurt like a bitch.

"Do I punch like a lady, too?" Zoro hissed.

"I didn't mean it like that," Sanji groaned and rubbed his cheek. This day was getting worse by the minute and he felt his fuse would be blowing any time soon. It took him all his willpower to stay calm and not kick this brutish bastard's teeth in. "I was talking about handsomeness. Something their ugly mugs lack big time."

"Fuck you, that's not an excuse! Comparing me to them is an insult in itself! Even the baboons on Mihawk's island were prettier than them!"

Against Sanji's will the image of a baboon in high heels and a shrill dress appeared before his mind's eye. He couldn't help himself and started laughing.

"What's so funny?" Zoro snarled but Sanji wasn't impressed by it anymore.

"Imagine it," he gasped and started laughing again.

"Imagine what?" Zoro asked annoyed.

"The baboons. Hahaha."

"I remember them and I don't see where they are funny."

"But the dresses. Hahaha." Sanji felt like a madman. Maybe the last two years had finally succeeded in driving him crazy. He didn't care anymore.

"I think you seriously have a screw lose."

"I fear so, too. Whew!" Sanji exhaled and finally calmed down again. "I'm sorry. I'm just so glad I don't have to see them ever again."

"The baboons?" Zoro asked, now utterly confused.

"No, moron. Iva and his trannies. Thank you for your assistance."

"It wasn't necessary to kiss me."

"I won't do it again. I swear," Sanji vowed and held his hands up to show he wasn't crossing his fingers. He meant it. He was a ladies' man after all!

"Better keep your word," Zoro said but the aggression had drained from him. "I'm going back to bed."

Sanji watched him pacing over to the bedroom and a slight frown appeared on his face when he caught himself staring. What the fuck was wrong with him? Ever since he had met Zoro he had been acting and feeling a little weird. Well, weirder than usual that was.

"Well, whatever," he sighed and focused on today's menu again. He needed to eat breakfast first of all. Running around with an empty stomach led nowhere as this encounter had proven.

He picked two eggs and half a bell pepper from the fridge and fresh herbs and spices from a shelf. An omelette sounded perfect for breakfast.

His cell rang again and taking a look at the ID he was more than relieved to see it was Luffy calling.

"Luffy, what's up?" he said after picking up.

"Sanji! Chopper told me we are starting early today. Why's that?" Luffy happily chirped into the phone.

"Because I have a surprise here I want to show you guys."

"Is it meat?" Luffy curiously asked and Sanji knew this was going to be a rather long chat if he didn't hang up immediately. He didn't.

"It is sort of a meat. But you are not allowed to eat it," he said teasingly.

"If it's meat I want to eat it," Luffy claimed and Sanji could only shake his head. He went over to the couch, completely forgetting about his plans for breakfast and slumped down. His cheek started pounding and he briefly wondered if it would bruise.

"You can do whatever you want with it but I won't cook it for you."

"You are so mean!" Luffy pouted and Sanij grinned.

"Believe me. As soon as you see it you won't want me to cook it anymore," he tried to persuade his friend but he knew it wouldn't work. Maybe he should tell him his meat was still alive?

"I don't think so!" Luffy cheered. "When shall I be there?"

"Whenever you please. You won't listen to me no matter what I say anyway, right?"

"Right!"

"But make sure you don't come here before three p.m., you hear me?"

"Yes. Loud and clear. I'll call the others and tell them so you can cook my meat," Luffy offered his help and for most likely the first time Sanji was willing to take it. He was sure talking to his beloved Nami-swan would heal his pounding cheek in no time and the beautiful Robin-chwan would make him forget all of Iva's gruesome trannies as soon as he would hear her voice pouring in his ears like summer rain. But he couldn't bring himself to be happy about the thought of talking to anyone before he had taken a nap. He was so incredibly tired all of a sudden he even forgot about his breakfast. Maybe those freaking trannies had drained his life's essence from him? Anyway, just five minutes of rest and he would be as good as new again.

"Thank you Luffy," he mumbled and hung up. The sudden sleepiness that was overwhelming him didn't even leave him awake for long enough to realise he was falling asleep.

Thank you for reading the second chapter of Act. I hope you enjoyed it so far. I'll give my best to edit the next chapters as soon as possible and upload them. Thank you for reviewing. :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three - Merry Christmas**

Zoro hadn't slept that well in what felt like forever to him. When he opened his eyes in his bed for the second time that day he was finally able to appreciate being home again.

All that he had missed, the familiarity of his surroundings, the feeling of being home and the knowledge his friends were just a phone call away, was there. He just needed to stretch out his hand and he would be able to touch the walls of his bedroom. Even without moving he was in his bed, resting on his pillow, covered with his blanket. Everything was as it should be. It even smelled of… well, not just him. Maybe not everything was perfect. But it was close. Really close.

He got up and stretched his muscles. They were still sore from the fighting and training with Mihawk until he had finally left Kuraigana Island. It had been the right thing to do, of course, but the freedom of lazing around was also welcomed by Zoro. Today he wouldn't do a thing, except for taking a shower and, hopefully, eating something nice when Chopper came over for his birthday party. Drinking a little booze wouldn't be too bad either.

He shrugged his shoulders and left the bedroom. First things first and the first thing for him was taking a shower. It completely took him by surprise to find the cook sleeping on the couch. Now that he wasn't bitching about anything Zoro found the time to notice the calm he emitted. It was obvious, though, why Zoro hadn't noticed it before. This guy just ticked him of no matter what he said or did. Talking about doing things. He needed to take a shower. Now.

It was unexpectedly chilly in the bathroom and made him want to feel hot water on his skin even more.

He slipped out of his shorts and stepped into the shower turning on the hot spray. It was splendid pleasure and helped him sort out his mind.

When his thoughts had cleared enough to enable him to come to sufficient conclusions he went through everything that had happened this morning after the cook that argued with that Ivankov-guy on the phone. Directly after that those strange caricatures of women-like beings had entered his apartment and the cook had made a fuss about it. Well, that part was quite understandable. He would have made a fuss about it as well. But why the blazes had the idiot kissed him? His sorry excuse of an explanation didn't make any sense. _Because you don't understand shit blah blah._ What the hell? And what had the blonde's refusal to let those queers touch him been about? It was a mystery to Zoro.

The sensation of their kiss crossed his mind again and a slight shudder ran down his spine and caused his stomach to tingle. It had been really... tempting and it had somehow left him craving for more at that time. And reliving it wasn't any better. He rested his forehead on the cold tiles and slowly exhaled, a slight groan was rolling in the back of his throat, but instead of calming him down it was spurring a subliminal feeling inside him he hadn't realised was there. It urged him to repeat the kiss with the cook. To deepen their relationship in a way he wasn't willing to think about. The growing intensity of this new sensation was making his head spin and his pulse quicken. It was horrifying him. He didn't want these feelings, he didn't need them. He turned the water to cold to distract himself from the tingling in his chest and his confusing thoughts.

He could hear the doorbell ring. It was a sound he had never been more grateful to hear. Focusing his sense of hearing on the sounds outside he heard Sanji walking to the door. Muffled voices were audible through the wall and Zoro decided it was high time for him to get out of the shower and dress himself.

He turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. It was nice to find the towels were still in the same place they had always been. He wrapped one around his waist and was about to leave the bathroom as the door flew open and Sanji ran into him.

"Why the fuck didn't you wake me up?" he immediately ranted into Zoro's face, just inches separating them. Zoro could feel his breath brushing over his damp skin. His gaze wandered from Sanji's fury-blazing eyes to his lips which were baring his teeth in a snarl, and back up to his eyes again. Zoro didn't even flinch, his mind being to preoccupied with processing the information of the sudden warmth creeping from Sanji's chest to his.

"Sanji, what are you doing?" Nami's voice sounded from the hall. So she had come over already. "Who are you talking with?"

"Do you have someone over? Sanji, you know you can't have sleepovers without me! I want you to make me dinner and a midnight-snack, too!," Luffy exclaimed.

Sanji still glared daggers at Zoro.

"So? I'm waiting for an answer."

"I didn't know you wanted me to. I'm not your mother, curly-brow," Zoro replied and tried to brush past Sanji. Cold hands grabbed his upper arms and a vein pulsed on Sanji's temple. A moment later Zoro was kicked in the head causing him to slip on the floor tiles and crash into the wall next to him.

He growled and launched himself at Sanji, bouncing into him and toppling him over so both of them were crashing on the wooden floor of the living room. Straddling Sanji's thighs Zoro fisted his T-shirt and pulled him closer again.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, bastard?" he yelled and only when he heard Nami's surprised yelp he realised that they had practically landed right in front of her and Luffy's feet. He turned to face them and all his anger drained from him seeing their faces again after so long.

"Hey," he said stupidly and smiled at them. He had thought so hard about what he would say to them after returning but now every single word he had ever learned had vanished from his mind. All he could think of was a stupid 'hey'.

No one in the room moved a muscle.

"Zoro?" Nami asked and much to his surprise she started crying from joy. "You are finally back," she gasped and a moment later he found her arms wrapped around his neck. He had expected Luffy to be happy to see him but having Nami jumping him with joy was something he would never have expected.

"Zoro!" Luffy cheered and bounced right into them, pulling Nami and Zoro into a tight hug. "This is so cool!"

Zoro returned their embraces happy to be home again and united with his loved ones. After all Nami and Luffy were his oldest friends.

"I'm so glad you are okay," Zoro mumbled smiling into their embrace. He had worried enough over the last two years and he was sure Luffy had done so much reckless shit even he couldn't keep up pace with. But this time it had cost him his eye and thus, worrying about Luffy had been more than justified.

"How is everyone?" he asked and gently pushed his friends from his chest.

"I can't believe you are having your welcome-home-conversation while sitting on my lap, marimo," Sanji butted in and everyone turned their heads at him. He had leant back and rested on his elbows, shaking his head in annoyance. "Now please take your dick out of my sight and get dressed."

"No one asked you to look there, idiot!" Zoro snapped and he could feel his cheeks burning. It was embarrassing. He wrapped his towel tighter around his hips before getting up and offering the cook a hand. Sanji ignored it and got to his feet with a fluent movement Zoro hadn't thought was possible.

"Sanji, why didn't you tell us that he is back?" Nami asked and to Zoro it seemed like a switch in Sanji's head was flipped by her question. Everything about the cook changed, his posture loosened, his gaze softened and his voice got so shrill it caused Zoro a headache.

"Nami-swan, love of my life, sun my world evolves around, I wanted it to be a surprise for you," he sing-songed. It was horrifying. Zoro huffed in annoyance and went to the bedroom to get dressed. He couldn't believe what he just had witnessed. He couldn't believe he had been attracted to such an embarrassingly lovesick puppy for just one second.

But the idiot wasn't dating Nami and there was no way she would ever agree to something like that. Not with such a love fool.

He pulled shorts, a pair of black pants from his closet and slipped them on. He took his time choosing what to wear on top since he wasn't keen on listening to the cook's shrill voice more than necessary. Pondering the pros and cons of a whit shirt to a purple shirt he settled for the white one. White was one of his favourite colours anyway. He slipped it on without bothering to button it up, he was at home, damn it. There was no need to get fancy.

Returning to the living room he found Luffy and Nami waiting for him on one of the couches.

"You really are back. For a minute I was worried we had just imagined it when you didn't come back from your bedroom," Nami said and smiled at him.

"Tell us what happened, Zoro!" Luffy demanded and started laughing in excitement. "Where have you been?"

"I was with Mihawk," Zoro stated and went over to the kitchen to get himself something to drink. "He trained me for the past two years."

"That is so cool!" Luffy cheered following Zoro to the kitchen. "You've got to tell me everything about it!"

Zoro grabbed a glass from the shelve and filled it with water.

"Would you like something to drink as well?" he asked no one in particular but both, Nami and Luffy, shook their heads.

"No, thank you," Nami said and took a seat at the counter. "Tell us your story, Zoro. What was it like to be with Mihawk?"

"Honestly, I don't want to talk about it. It was nothing spectacular. We didn't really enjoy our company or something like that - it just served a purpose. That's it," Zoro truthfully answered her question. It hadn't been fun to be with Mihawk. It hadn't been supposed to be fun so it was alright with him. Still, the disappointment on Nami's and Luffy's face was enough to add, "I learned some really crazy moves I can show you one of these days. That's if you want me to."

"Of course! That would be awesome!" Luffy shouted with joy and bounced on his chair.

"What would be awesome?" Sanji asked stepping out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his hips and another one around his shoulders.

"Zoro is going to show us his new moves!" Luffy chirped.

"Ah, okay. But wait until after dinner, please. I'll get dressed and start cooking in a minute," Sanji said and went to the bedroom to get dressed. Zoro didn't get him one bit.

"Do the two of you get along?" Nami suddenly asked and Zoro didn't know what to say. He wasn't sure if getting along was the right term for whatever they were.

"Does it matter?" he questioned, which was obviously the wrong thing to do.

"Of course it does matter!" she yelled. "You morons are going to live together! It's essential that you get along, idiot!"

Zoro hadn't seen that coming. Of course he wouldn't kick Sanji out but he didn't consider letting him stay as living together. Living together would require some sort of relationship they didn't have.

"Why would we be going to live together?" he therefore asked.

"Because of your jobs!" Luffy butted in.

"What jobs? I came home just this morning. How in the world am I supposed to have a job already?" Zoro asked. He was sure he wouldn't like the answer, though. Whatever plan Luffy had been working out it would be something completely crazy.

"You'll co-act in the Pirate King movie special. We designed the characters to fit all of my friends to begin with so it's only natural to let you act yourself, don't you agree?"

"No. I think it's stupid. But that won't help me, will it?"

"Of course not! It's already been decided. You'll be Roronoa Zoro - The legendary pirate hunter. You'll love it," Luffy explained and Zoro couldn't really bring himself to look forward to it.

"Aren't you the pirate king? Wouldn't being a pirate hunter make me your enemy?"

Luffy frowned at him and pouted. Why did everyone think he would get their trains of thought without having the faintest idea of what was going on? He wasn't retarded, of course, but he wasn't clairvoyant as well. He needed at least some hints to get the big picture.

"No, dummy. You are a valuable member of my crew."

"Of course, I am. Sorry for asking. What about the cook?"

"He's my cook!"

Zoro rolled his eyes. He didn't need to ask further questions to know what bunch of freaks this crew would be. He knew his friends well enough for that.

"And he'll be living here because…?"

"Because he already does," Luffy stated.

"That's not the reason, rubber-head!" Nami butted in and slapped Luffy on the back of his head.

"He'll be living here to save expenses. Honestly, producing this movie of yours is going to cost a fortune and we can't afford to waste money. Thus, all of you will get paid next to nothing until the movie generates profit. Zoro, you can't afford to kick him out."

That sounded convincing but really bad. At least he wouldn't be homeless himself. Becoming an actor wasn't really what he wanted, but he couldn't care less about what job he had to do to make money. Still, he would have to look for another job to make a living with-in case Shanks didn't see a chance for him to officially compete in kendo tournaments again. Nami's idea of not paying them was sure cost effective and didn't surprise him but he couldn't make a living from it.

"Don't worry, marimo," Sanji said suddenly appearing next to him, lighting a new cigarette. Now that he wasn't wearing a pyjama but black slacks and a dark blue shirt with pale blue dots Zoro finally recognised him as the fighter he had met two years ago. Wearing a suit had made the cook change his stance. He looked more than ready to fight whoever got in his way. It reminded Zoro of his own change in attitude when he put on his bandana. It was good to see the cook hadn't gone completely mad just because Nami was around. "I won't let you starve. I saved enough money to keep us alive until I get a new job. Plus, your bank accounts haven't been touched. So, you shouldn't be broke as well."

"My bank accounts?"

"You know what that is, don't you? You can't be that much of a Neanderthal."

"Of course I know but how do you know about them?" It wasn't that Zoro had really thought about his finances up until now. He was lucky to have such good friends to even have an eye on such trivial stuff.

"That's a secret. Now leave my kitchen, I need to prepare dinner," Sanji said and their conversation was over. "Nami, light of my life, would you care for a cocktail? I want to try a new recipe I've come across at Ivankov's place." There he was again in his obnoxious lapdog mode. Zoro took his glass and joined Luffy and Nami on the other side of the counter.

"No, Sanji. I don't want anything yet," Nami said and rolled her eyes. So she wasn't really happy about the cook's attitude as well. Knowing her, it didn't surprise Zoro.

"So, what have you guys been up to? I heard you got yourself a manager, Luffy?" Zoro tried to make conversation but Sanji's cell rang and Luffy curiously watched Sanji picking up.

If something was interesting enough to distract Luffy from talking to Zoro after so long it sure as hell must be something worth seeing. Zoro looked at the cook as well and the pure annoyance in his face as he stared at his cell was enough to make Zoro smile.

Sanji reluctantly picked up.

"Yeah?" he asked and listened to whoever was calling him. "I never heard that name before and I don't think I recognise your voice," he added and a mischievous grin spread on his lips. "Sorry, I don't remember someone called that. But Merry Christmas," he said and hung up.

"Who was it?" Luffy asked curiously.

"Ivankov."

"But you know him, Sanji. You worked for him for the past two years," Luffy stated utterly confused.

"I know that. I just don't want to talk to him."

"But why?" Luffy asked but then his cell rang and he picked up without looking at the caller-ID. "Hello? Oh, Iva-chan. Merry Christmas! What's up?"

Luffy listened to Ivankov screaming in his phone. It was loud enough for Zoro to understand that Sanji had deeply offended him.

"Oi, shit-cook. I know you have a shitty attitude but what's this about?" he asked to annoy Sanji a little more.

"Shut up, idiot!" the cook snapped started preparing dinner without paying further attention to his surroundings anymore. It was boring.

"You mean Zoro? He's the swordfighter I told you about," Luffy suddenly said and Zoro directed his attention at him again. "Shishishi. Yes, he is. Why? Oh, sure. Zoro, it's for you," Luffy said after a short while and handed his cell to Zoro who stared at raising an eyebrow in question. Why the fuck would Iva-whatever want to talk to him of all people?

He held the cell up to his ear and said, "Hello?" What a grand opening for a conversation.

"Oh, what a voice. This is Ivankov, vyou can call me Iva, Zoro-boy," the mysterious Iva-chan introduced himself to Zoro. He sounded like any other ordinary guy with a strange way of speaking.

"What do you want from me?" Zoro asked not really sure what to say at all.

"Vyou know, Vi sent my candies over to candy-boy's place this morning to tell him something as a Christmas gift. But due to an indecent event they forgot about it," Ivankov said and Zoro didn't get one word of it. He had never been fond of riddles. Why couldn't the guy just say what he wanted.

"So?" he asked and hoped it would help him getting answers.

"Vi wanted to tell candy-boy directly but he hung up on me," Ivankov said sounding offended. So he was talking about the cook. Looking at Sanji tried to make sense of the candy-boy-thing but he couldn't think of a reason to call the cook that.

"I know that much," Zoro he said piecing two and two together. So Ivankov had been Sanji's boss and the boss of the horrid elves who had been here this morning. See, it wasn't that hard to understand the mysteries of queer people.

"Since Vi don't hate anything more than people who forget me, Vi'm not in the mood of telling him anymore. But vyou could make me want to tell him again."

"Why would I?" Zoro asked surprised. I really wasn't his business to play answering machine for anyone.

"Vi have some wonderful snapshots of the two of you kissing here, so Vi thought vyou might actually care about vyour boyfriends future and wellbeing." That definitely wasn't true. He was no one's boyfriend. Still, it held enough reason to consider playing along for the moment. After all it sounded important enough to ignore the details of their relationship.

"So, it's about something important?"

"Yes, it is. Why else would Vi bother calling him?" Ivankov asked rhetorically. "Vi wanted to tell him something about his father but Vi don't want to anymore. Unless _you_ pay for it, since _candy-boy_ doesn't want to talk to me."

This candy-boy-thing started to piss Zoro off. Nonetheless, the words future, wellbeing and father sounded quite serious to him. What if Sanji's dad was hospitalised and Ivankov somehow had learned about it? What if Sanji's father was in big trouble and had been looking for Sanji at his working place just to not find him there? There were various possibilities and not one of them was nice. Zoro nodded his head. He had decided to try and help. He had done more stupid things for people he hadn't even known by name. So, why not?

"How much?" he asked for the price of the information Ivankov had to offer. Since his bank accounts hadn't been touched he should have enough to pay for now and get it back from the cook later.

"Vi'm not talking about money. Seeing your passionate kiss on this little pictures Vi only want to know one thing," Iva purred into his phone and a cold shiver crept down Zoro's spine. He wasn't sure if he really wanted to know what the guy was talking about but when he didn't talk on Zoro said, "You need to say it. I'm no clairvoyant."

"What was it like?" Ivankov asked, excitement clearly audible in his voice.

"Pardon?" Zoro gasped not really sure if he had gotten the question right.

"Vi want you to describe the feel of it."

"I still don't get it," he stated. Ivankov clicked his tongue impatiently.

"Vi want the most graphic description vyou ever made of something in vyour entire life!" he eventually declared and Zoro knew immediately what to reply.

"I'd prefer ripping my tongue out."

"So you'll be fine without him knowing what his dad-he hasn't seen in two years-wanted to tell him on Christmas?" Ivankov asked and Zoro wasn't sure if they were heading towards emotional blackmail already. It felt quite like it.

"Why can't he tell him himself?" he asked as a last try to avoid having to talk to Ivankov longer than necessary. It would lead nowhere anyway.

"Candy-boy's not the most affable person Vi know and so is his dad. Their relationship is quite… sour, if vyou ask me."

"I know exactly what you mean," Zoro replied, trying to stare a hole into Sanji's head. The idiot sure was hard to deal with and, seriously, it didn't surprise him after what Sanji had told him about being kicked out of his father's restaurant that they didn't talk to each other anymore.

"So, it's vme or no one to tell him," Ivankov added and Zoro knew he had no real alternative left. Except for… an idea crossed his mind and a mischievous grin spread on his lips. Why would he be the only one having to deal with such a troublesome situation?

"Fine," he said rising from his chair and pacing over to the staircase behind the dining table which lead to the rooftop garden. "Oi, shit-cook. Come with me."

Sanji looked up from his work and frowned, he didn't even stop in cutting the vegetable he had in front of him.

"Forget it. You can't go up there unless Luffy says so," he stated firmly and Zoro wondered how much of what was going on around him the cook actually noticed. Zoro looked at Luffy and raised his eyebrows in question for permission. Why the hell did he even need permission from Luffy to go to his own rooftop garden?

"Not until we hand out the presents," Luffy said and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Zoro sighed. This was getting ridiculous.

"Damn it," he hissed and quickly thought about his alternatives. One was as good as the other so he decided to go to his bedroom. "This is about you, love-cook, so come here already!"

"Vyou have a strange way to sweet-talk each other," Ivankov mused on the other end of the line. He sounded rather amused.

"But it works," Zoro replied when Sanji finally laid down his knife and followed him to the bedroom. Zoro closed the door behind Sanji as soon as he had entered.

"What is it you wannah…," Sanji said but was cut off when Zoro grabbed his collar and shoved his back against the door before he pressed his lips against the cook's. He tried to be gentle but his boiling anger was more than he could handle.

"This time it really better be worth it," he growled onto Sanji's lips and was rewarded with a slight moan. That was a reaction Zoro hadn't expected. It somehow blew a fuse in him, just like it had this morning and Zoro found himself devoured by passion. He claimed Sanji's mouth; tongues were clashing and teeth were scraping over each other's lips. Zoro could feel Sanji gasp as he ground his body against his, deepening their kiss. Like this morning the textures of the cook's lips and tongue were mesmerizing to him, making him crave for more the moment he tasted them. A groan escaped his throat and his groin started tingling when Sanji grabbed his neck and pulled him closer, forcing his way in his mouth again. He playfully bit Sanji's tongue and brushed his lips one last time over the cook's before he retreated. He was breathing heavily and it took him a moment to remember why he had kissed the blonde to begin with. It had been so intense. Seeing that Sanji wanted to say something he rested his finger on his lips to silence him.

He took one last deep breath and asked "So?" Sanji looked at him in question obviously not realising that Zoro was still on the phone.

"This… was…" Iva stammered and an evil little grin spread on Zoro's lips.

"Worth keeping your word?" he suggested.

"Actually, Vi wanted to say just like porn, but yes. Tell the candy-boy Zeff-boy wants to see him at the Baratie tomorrow morning. His shift starts at ten a.m. He won't accept candy-boy's refusal." Well, if that wasn't a welcomed surprise. So at least the cook wouldn't have to starve when Nami made them work like slaves. Having a job waiting for you sure was a nice Christmas gift. And it was way better than the horror scenarios Zoro had expected.

"Thank you, Ivankov. I'll tell him."

"Vi don't really know why but Vi feel like Vi should thank vyou instead. Vi'm looking forward to meeting vyou in person one day, Zoro-boy."

"Whatever," Zoro replied and hung up. He couldn't really say that he was keen on meeting this freak.

Finally when he directed his attention back to Sanji he found him staring back thunderstruck.

"What the fuck was that?! " he stammered and Zoro finally snapped completely back to reality. His mood instantly darkened.

"Payment because you are a bloody idiot!" he snapped and clenched his fists, nearly breaking Luffy's cell. This was bad. He had let his instincts take over and not thought about the consequences. It didn't matter though. Sanji would understand his reasoning as soon as he told him what Ivankov had told him. There was no need to get agitated over a kiss. A really great kiss.

"Payment? What for? I didn't do anything!"

"Stop bitching and listen to what I have to say," Zoro half-heartedly tried to calm the cook. "Your two strange friends who visited us this morning forgot to tell you what Ivankov wanted them to tell you. Thus, Ivankov called you to tell you himself but you hung up on him."

"It can't be that important if it's from him," Sanji mumbled and pushed himself from the door to leave. He had already opened the door a bit when Zoro slammed it shut again.

"Oh, really? You think I went out of my way for nothing?" he growled through his teeth. "That I'm letting your slimy tongue rub over my face for fun?"

The urge to beat this annoying prick to a pulp nearly suffocated him. He didn't know why he was so annoyed, though, because it really hadn't bothered him to kiss the cook.

"Then tell me what the hell's going on!" he demanded losing his temper.

"You see, Ivankov didn't feel like telling me his message for you for free but insisted on playing games. He wanted to know what I thought about my _boyfriend's_ kiss this morning. I just didn't think my opinion on that would have satisfied him so I thought of something else to give him in return for the information," Zoro spat, "I hope you're glad to hear that Zeff wants to see you at the Baratie tomorrow at ten a. m. He wants your sorry ass to work for him again."

Sanji looked at him as if he had grown a second head.

"Oh," he finally said and genuine surprise spread on his face and finally turned into a frown. "That's all he said?"

"Isn't that enough?" Zoro snarled, slowly losing his cool as he realised, that it wasn't. At least that was what the cook's frown told him as it deepened.

"Zeff would have called me tomorrow when I hadn't shown up. He loves nagging so I think he might even prefer it that way."

A deep growl rumbled in Zoro's throat. So this was everything the cook had to say about it? No 'thank you for your concern' no 'that was very kind of you' or some shit like that. It was ticking Zoro off and he suddenly needed fresh air. He couldn't breathe properly and felt like a huge idiot for trying to help the cook.

"You know what, fuck you! You've been nothing but trouble since I came home. Do me a favour and get out of my apartment as quickly as possible when the party's over!"

Zoro was at his wits' end and fed up to the back teeth. Somehow getting rid of the blonde sounded pretty appealing as a means to get rid of his anger as well. He didn't need all of this.

"I never asked to stay with you, asshole! Why don't you go fuck yourself while I start packing?!" the cook snapped and, oddly, it made Zoro even angrier that he had won this argument so easily.

"The sooner you get out of here the better!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Zoro stormed out of the bedroom slamming the door shut behind him. He was practically blazing with fury. He couldn't remember when he had been this angry before. He didn't even know why he was so angry now that things were settled. Normally he would have shrugged the entire incident off as asshole behaviour and immediately forgotten about it. But being with the cook was so different. The fact that he felt like an idiot didn't improve his mood one bit.

"Zoro, what's wrong?" Nami asked but Zoro didn't pay attention to her. He stomped over to the staircase and went upstairs to the rooftop garden. By now he needed air so badly his head started aching.

"Hey! I said you can't go upstairs yet!" Luffy shouted and followed after Zoro, who slammed the door shut in front of his face without even noticing him.

It just wasn't like him to slam doors he suddenly noticed and it infuriated him even more that he had lost the last bit of control over his temper. He had always had a bad temper but he had never lost control of it. Why hadn't he just hit the cook in the face to make a point like he always did? What the hell was wrong with him?

-X-

Sanji was standing in the bedroom and didn't really know what just had happened. He had been kissed by Zoro and, well, it had surprised him quite a lot, if not shocked him. But what bothered him was, that they hadn't fought because of it but because of... what exactly? Obviously everything was the damn old geezer's fault for making things complicated.

Still, he couldn't figure out why things had turned out like this: him being kicked out of the apartment. It didn't help that he was seething by now just because Zoro pissed him off. Who the hell solved an argument like that? Over something as trivial as his father wanting to talk to him.

Well, honestly, who the hell didn't care when his father called him on Christmas to tell him he wanted to see him back home? Maybe-just maybe-he knew what he had done wrong, but realising it didn't change the fact that it was only making him angrier because he couldn't stand himself for getting Zoro so worked up over his problems. He shouldn't have played dumb with Ivankov in the first place, which pissed him off even more. Now everything was his own fault.

"Damn it!" he hissed and went over to the wardrobe to start packing. Maybe moving back home was the smartest thing to do anyway since he and Zoro had been at each other's throat today more than was reasonable for people being supposed to be friends.

Ripping the drawers open and stuffing random socks and underwear in a bag he had stored underneath the bed he was cursing his own stupidity and the fact that he had managed to be nothing more than an arse. What the fuck had Zoro been thinking when he had kissed him out of the blue like that? It had served no purpose since Zeff would call Sanji eventually when he felt like it. Of course, Zoro couldn't have known about his and Zeff's rather odd relationship but he sure as hell hadn't had to go that far for his sake. Really, if something had happened to the old geezer no one at the Baratie would have hesitated to call him right away. Well, that was just another thing Zoro couldn't have known. Thinking about it like that made his gesture somewhat… sweet.

He paused in packing his bag and sat down on the bed, burying his face in his hands. Why the hell was he acting so weird when it came to Zoro? He already had a notion about his reasons, but he was far from admitting them to himself.

"Sanji, are you alright?" Nami asked through the bedroom door and when Sanji didn't reply she opened it and stepped inside. Sanji looked up at her through his fingers and saw her worried expression. "Zoro seemed to be quite upset and I was wondering what happened. You guys were just fine a minute ago."

"It's breaking my heart to cause you worry, beloved Nami-swan, but…," Sanji sighed. "I sort of picked a fight with him and now Zoro wants me to move out of here tomorrow. I thought I might as well start packing."

"Sanji, don't be silly," she said and sat down on the bed next to him. "You can't move out of here. It's against my plans as you know. Now tell me what happened."

Nami placed her hand on Sanji's upper thigh and even though this gesture would have caused him to suffer a heart attack out of pure happiness any other day, he didn't really notice it now but simply placed his hand on Nami's slightly caressing it with his thumb.

"Don't worry about it. I'll fix this somehow," Sanji said not really explaining their situation. "And maybe giving him a bit more personal space is the right thing to do now." Nami pulled her hand out under his and hit him on the back of his head.

"You are an idiot, Sanji," she said shaking her head. "You won't be going anywhere. Now be a man and apologize. It's easy isn't it?"

"I know you are right. But it is everything but easy," Sanij sighed and rose to his feet. He could do this. He was a man, for fuck's sake. He straightened his shirt and went to the door just to stop and smile back at Nami. "Thank you, Nami-swan. You are just as wise as you are beautiful."

"I know," she said smirking and followed him out.

Sanji couldn't see Luffy in the living room so he figured he was talking to Zoro on the rooftop.

He found Luffy and Zoro standing side by side in front of the huge glass walls Usopp and Franky had installed for Zoro so he could use the rooftop garden as a separate room for training instead of stuffing all his training equipment into the living room. Sanji had really liked the idea of rebuilding Zoro's rooftop garden for him while he wasn't around. It had taken Franky and Usopp months to master all of this in their spare time. Sanji had just asked Ms Makino, the landlady, for permission. She had liked their idea from the start since she had really seemed to be fond of Zoro. But now that Zoro was finally up here and not really looking happy, Sanji felt a little awkward for spoiling the surprise.

Luffy had not noticed him yet and went on talking as earnestly as he only was when the matters at hand were really serious.

Zoro just glanced at Luffy and Sanji couldn't read the look on his face. It was weird to see them standing there without exchanging any words at all while it seemed as if they were sharing the world's hidden secrets.

"I won't ask what happened but I tell you to fix it," Luffy suddenly said.

"I know, Luffy," Zoro replied quietly and turned to look out of the window again. "He's just driving me nuts."

"He's a great cook."

"He told me about that. But what has that to do with anything?"

"Everything! The meat he roasts is just the best! He's amazing."

Sanji couldn't help but smile. He should tell them he was there already but decided against it when Luffy spoke up again.

"Did you know that Sanji took care of your stuff while you were not around? Paying the rent, bills, checking your mail for important things, dealing with phone calls, stuff like that. He and Shanks even thought of a convincing explanation why you weren't around without bringing up Mihawk or hints to the circumstances under which you really left."

"How the hell should I know these things?," Zoro replied and kept on staring out the window. Sanji decided to end his eavesdropping and spoke up.

"I told everyone you were hit by a truck and in a coma," he said and strolled over to stand next to Luffy.

"That's not funny, idiot," Zoro growled and for a moment Sanji wasn't sure if it had been such a good idea to come here. But he couldn't disappoint Nami.

"Seriously, I said exactly that. Shanks also believed it to be the best solution , so we agreed on it. It also explained why we didn't know when you'd be around again," Sanji explained and smiled when he remembered the absurd conversation all of them had had with Shanks after Zoro had left, trying to find the best explanation for his absence. The main reason behind the need for a believable explanation had been to keep the kendo world of Zoro's back as long as he couldn't participate in any matches and still leave better publicity than telling he had simply disappeared.

"I received tons of flowers from God knows who for you. I guess they were from your kendo rivals and fans. I kept the cards and took pictures of the flowers - just in case you cared to see them. Even Law sent flowers even though he knew exactly where you were."

Sanji pulled out his cigarettes and lighter from his pocket and lit up.

"I think you'll be fine without us, right?" Luffy asked and went over to Nami, who had followed Sanji without him noticing, to go downstairs with her again. Sanji wasn't sure if that would be a good idea but he wouldn't ask him to stay either. All he had to do was to apologize properly. It couldn't be that hard, could it?

He looked at Zoro who was staring at him blankly.

"Listen, Zoro," he said puffing out little clouds of smoke, "I know I've been an arse and I'm sorry."

"Sorry about what exactly?" Zoro asked tonelessly.

Sanji snorted and rubbed his face. "I guess saying 'everything that went wrong so far' won't cut it, right?"

Zoro didn't reply. He didn't need to. Sanji took a deep breath and thought about what to say next so he wouldn't fuck it up again.

"I'm sorry for not appreciating your efforts to help me out with Ivankov," he said and it was the only thing he genuinely felt sorry about. He knew that he hadn't shown his best side so far but he didn't feel sorry for that. Still, he felt the need to explain what he meant a little clearer.

"I didn't consider that you couldn't know about how Zeff and I interact. I might have made you think we hate our guts but in fact it is the opposite. I owe him so much and I would do anything for him but… he's not into emotional stuff so we have a rather rude way of talking to each other. When he kicked me out of the apartment two years ago, it wasn't to punish me for anything. I should have said so earlier. It was his way of making me help Luffy. He likes Luffy a lot, even though he tore down half the restaurant's roof."

Zoro raised an eyebrow at him but remained silent so Sanji went on babbling. Somehow he couldn't stand the silence.

"He was most likely worried Luffy would be in trouble with dealing with all your shit. Why he kicked me out of the restaurant and why I ended up at Ivankov's shitty place will always be beyond me but I was never worried Zeff wouldn't talk to me anymore. It's true, though, that I didn't see him during the last two years. I didn't even call him once. But every once in a while I received packages with food from the Baratie-so I would be able to eat 'real food' every once in a while. At least that's what the letters said. Those shitty bastards didn't change one bit." Sanji smiled and a soothing warmth spread in his chest as he thought about Zeff and his cooks at the Baratie. They were Sanji's family after all.

"I'm sorry Ivankov made you kiss me. Why did he want that anyway?"

Zoro took his time before answering but when he did, a sheepish smile appeared on his lips.

"He didn't."

"Pardon?" Sanji didn't get it. Not one bit of it.

"He wanted me to describe the kiss you gave me this morning. I don't know why but your strange friends took pictures of us and showed them to him and he was just curious, I guess."

"That doesn't explain anything. You could have told him some random shit or just have said what you thought of it," Sanji said still confused.

"Over my dead body. I won't talk about stupid shit like that. Even I have my limits," Zoro declared and Sanji realised he should have known it from the start. Zoro simply wasn't the emotional, let alone romantic type. Of course, he would look for another way to get out of that situation and since he seemed to be a man of action…

"I see. So, how do you like your dojo?" Sanji changed the topic just to say something. He shoved his hands deep into his pockets and tried to ignore the fact that it was running late and he still hadn't started cooking. He didn't even know if he was allowed to cook anymore. It all depended on Zoro's reaction and whether he accepted Sanji's apology or not.

"It's beautiful," Zoro said and a genuine smile spread on his lips. "I don't think I deserve it, though. I didn't do anything but cause trouble for all of you while I was gone. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize to me. I got nice flowers every day and a completely furnished apartment. It was not really a bother-as long as you were gone," Sanji teased and was awarded with a strange look from Zoro he couldn't read. It took Zoro a while to think through whatever was on his mind but when he finally spoke up it made Sanji's heart leap.

"You don't have to leave if you don't want to," he said and it were the nicest words Sanji had heard from Zoro so far.

"I think I should pack nonetheless just to see Chopper run rampage on you," Sanji stated and a mischievous grin spread on Zoro's lips.

"Who do you think he'd run rampage on if I told him what you said just now?"

"I'll soothe him with his birthday cake. Damn, I nearly forgot to roast the goose. Shit," he said and strolled over to the staircase. "Won't you join me? Luffy might suspect I murdered you if you don't tag along."

"As if you could do that, shit-cook."

"We both know I could, marimo," Sanji said and went downstairs without waiting for a reply.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys!**

 **Thank you so much for reading my little story. I hope you've enjoyed it so far and are looking forward to what comes next. I promise it won't get boring. Have fun!**

 **Chapter Four - Happy Birthday**

Zoro settled for watching the cook working his magic in the kitchen. Cooking had never been particularly interesting for him but now he realised that his ignorance had not been justified. Honestly, he had never thought about how to cook a goose or potato dumplings but now that he saw it, he knew he wouldn't have the nerve to do it. There was so much to do and to pay attention to that he was glad he could just sit there and drink beer while Nami and Luffy told him about what they had been up to over the past two years, with focus on the infamous Pirate King series. There was so much freaked out shit going on in the series Zoro couldn't really follow the storyline. It was just so like Luffy to come up with such crazy ideas.

Just when Luffy was about to tell him how he had fought against his own shadow which had been stolen away by a wicked guy named Geeky Maria or something the doorbell rang. Zoro didn't bother opening, since the cook had already left the kitchen to do so and Luffy was nearing the showdown of his story. The guy obviously possessed a devil fruit power, just like Luffy who was made of rubber in the series, and was a member of the Mysterious Four. It highly reminded Zoro of the Shichibukai and Yonko - just in an odd way. They were facing off and Luffy barely managed to win against the giant monster possessed by his shadow. It was nice. Zoro just didn't get how he and the cook were supposed to take place in all of this. After all, the cast for the series had long been chosen. But that was something he would think about later.

"Chopper, happy birthday!" Sanji welcomed their special guest. "Hey, guys. Robin, my lovely evening star, it's so good to see you."

"Ohohoho, what a lovely Christmas tree," Brook stated entering the living room. "Good evening, Nami. Luffy," he greeted his friends, completely ignoring the fact that Zoro sat right next to them. Usopp, Chopper, Franky and Robin followed after him while the cook went back to the kitchen.

Zoro just watched, glad to see they all were doing fine and almost looking the same as ever. All of them had matured, just like himself. Even Luffy-there was something in his eyes Zoro had never seen there before and thus couldn't name it. But he was sure he would learn about it sooner or later.

Maybe it was because Luffy was already stuffing his mouth with cookies that prevented his friends from realising that something was odd in the picture. But there was one of them who would never miss Zoro's return. Chopper nearly fainted when he set eyes on Zoro, his eyes becoming big like saucers.

"Zoro!" he shouted happily and a threw himself into Zoro's arms barely a moment later, hugging him with a force he wouldn't have given the teen credit for.

"I'm back," Zoro said and noticed that it wasn't much smarter than the stupid 'hey' he had welcomed Luffy and Nami with earlier. "Happy Birthday, Chopper," he therefore added and gleaming eyes looked up at him.

"This is the best present ever!" Chopper stated and Zoro saw Sanji rolling his eyes with a smile on his lips as he said: "I wanted him to wear a nice ribbon around his neck but he refused."

Chopper started giggling. "That would have been awesome."

"That would have been weird!" Usopp butted in and patted Zoro's back in brotherly affection. "I knew you wouldn't leave Captain Usopp's crew without returning sooner or later and having a really good excuse for your absurdly long absence."

"Didn't they tell you?" Zoro asked as earnest as he could. He had missed the outrageous stories Usopp used to tell. Honestly, Mihawk hadn't been much of an entertainer. Not that Zoro needed entertainment, but he appreciated it. Usopp frowned at him tilting his head to the side.

"Tell me what?" he asked.

"That I was hit by a truck and in a coma."

Usopp gaped at him as well as Franky and Chopper. Robin started giggling and Nami joined her.

"Touché," Sanji stated, Schadenfreude written all over his face.

"You are lying!" Usopp finally yelled and everyone burst out laughing. "I thought your strange bushido rules forbade lying!"

"I'm not lying. Just challenging your intelligence."

"Says the moss-head," Sanji teased and placed a new bottle of beer in front of Zoro.

"Shut up. I wasn't talking to you," Zoro replied and looked at Usopp again. "So, how have you been?" He looked normal, more muscular but not really different.

"Fine. Just fine, but you look a little battered," Usopp stated and immediately added, "I, as the notorious Captain Usopp, would not have ended up in such a state. I…"

Zoro had heard enough and turned his attention to his other friends, taking in their appearances closer. Brook hadn't changed a bit. Well, he was huge, old and outrageously flamboyant in style. Some things just couldn't be topped and Brook's style was one of them.

"Zoro, seeing you is just _super_!" Franky shouted and Zoro was sure he would break down in tears of joy any minute. Franky had become even more of a hulk than he had already been. It wasn't easy to impress Zoro in built but Franky never failed-despite his odd way of dressing in Hawaiian shirts and swimming trunks. Why he hadn't been arrested for scandalising society so far was beyond Zoro.

"I agree," Brook finally said and sat down at the dining table after greeting everybody properly. "It's great to see you are fine."

"So, what did I miss? Or was life without me that boring?" Zoro asked and turned in his seat to face his friends, resting his elbows on the counter. Never would he have been able to foresee the impact his question had on them.

"Man, you should have been there!" Usopp burst out.

"Luffy was so _super_!" Franky joined him.

"You idiots, he was severely wounded!" Chopper lectured but was completely ignored. Zoro just didn't get what they were talking about.

"Why don't you guys start the story at the crucial point when Ace got imprisoned in Impel Down?" Sanji suggested and Zoro could only gape at him stupidly.

"Ace got what?" he gasped and a moment later he knew he should have kept his mouth shut. Everyone was trying to explain everything at once to him and he didn't understand a single word they were saying. All he understood was that he would be going deaf soon if they kept yelling in his ears like that.

When Luffy finally spoke up, his eyes sparkled with excitement and everyone else fell silent.

"Ace was caught by Blackbeard and handed over to the World Government. I went to Impel Down to save him."

"He tore apart half the prison causing a riot of the prisoners. God damn it, he freed the most dangerous people history has ever heard of! Including Sanji's boss Ivankov." Usopp butted in and he didn't really seem happy now.

"Ex-boss. I insist on that detail," Sanji butted in but was ignored by Usopp who happily babbled on. "Ace was then taken to the Marineford for execution and a freaking war broke out. Whitebeard was there, the entire Shichibukai, the Marines as well. Things got really ugly!"

"We freed Ace, that's all that counts for me," Luffy said and Zoro could only shake his head. This was just so like Luffy it didn't even surprise him.

"Sounds like you could use it for your Pirate King series," Zoro mused before he finally realised what they had just told him. "Are you telling me that you openly opposed the World Government, broke into the most high-end maximum security prison there is and actually succeeded? That's like a declaration of war." He was not surprised that Luffy had caused a huge commotion but to actually start a war was something you didn't do every day. It was exactly what he would have done. Zoro was proud to be friends with Luffy.

"You could say so," Luffy replied grinning at him.

"Then why aren't you imprisoned? I think starting a war qualifies for that."

"Shanks." Luffy's grin grew even wider.

"Shanks?" Zoro didn't get it. He knew Shanks. Shanks was one of the most precious friends Luffy had. He had been the one to give Luffy his straw-hat. Shanks was also the one who had promoted Zoro in Kendo and become his manager. But how did that fit together with a war and Luffy's impending imprisonment?

"He showed up at the Marineford and ended the war. He was amazing!" Luffy explained, his grin never leaving his face. "Oh, and he's an Emperor."

Zoro tried to piece the puzzle together. So Shanks was an emperor. Of which country? Was that something like being a king? And why would that matter?

His confusion was obvious to at least Robin.

"There are the World Government, the Shichibukai and the Yonko, the three powers to rule over the world, right?" she asked him and Zoro nodded. He wasn't an idiot. He knew how the world worked. "The Shichibukai are the Royal Seven Warlords, Mihawk being the most famous among them, and the Yonko are the Four Emperors. And Shanks is one of them."

"Which means he is one of the most notorious and most powerful gangsters there are, despite being a really nice guy. Well, that's big news," Zoro concluded and decided it was high time to get some booze to stomach all this.

"I'd like to propose a toast to Ace and Shanks," Brook stated and raised his cup of tea Zoro hadn't noticed before.

"You get your toast if I get booze. You can't toast on tea, you know?" Zoro replied and a moment later he found a cup of sake in his hand.

"Happy now?" Sanji asked and glared at him while filling shots for the others with their favourite liquors to hand them out for the toast. He sure was a great host.

"It's Christmas and Chopper's birthday. How could I not be?" Zoro stated, a smile spreading on his lips.

"Don't think saying that will make me happy, idiot!" Chopper ranted but his happy face said otherwise.

"You wanted to toast, Brook," Zoro said and cocked an eyebrow at Brook.

"Yes. Well, on Ace and Shanks. May they fare well in whatever's about to come," Brook said solemnly.

"And a toast on Zoro, may he never lose sight...," Usopp added.

"Don't you dare mock him!" Chopper interrupted him.

"Why would I mock him?" Usopp asked completely confused by Chopper's sudden outburst.

"He lost an eye, idiot!" Chopper ranted and Usopp finally realised what the teen was talking about and grumbled "So now that's my fault or what? What I wanted to say was that he may never lose sight _of his home and friends again_ ," before he downed his shot.

That was actually a rather nice toast, Zoro thought. Of course, he had not forgotten about his friends for a second while he had been away and smiling into his cup of sake he vowed to himself that he never would.

Sort of a toast-contest started and the more toasts they proposed, the drunker they got and the shittier their toasts became. They toasted on the mightiest animals in the world-Santa's reindeers; the quickest postman there was-Santa, delivering all the presents around the world in just one night; the invention of Christmas, the invention of birthday parties, and ultimately the invention of toasting itself. Zoro had never seen them getting hammered that quickly while they hadn't even had dinner yet. Maybe that was exactly the reason. It was a dreadful sight, really.

The only ones unaffected by the alcohol were him and Nami-and Nami was a witch. Never before had he encountered a woman who could drink booze like her. He had never met a guy who could as well, except for himself. Not even the cook who looked still sober enough to handle his cooking could compete to her because he had cheated and had skipped every other toast to get dinner ready. But still the cook wasn't as sober as he might have thought he was.

"So, you drunken morons," Sanji finally said and balanced their plates around the counter to serve dinner. Roasted goose with potato dumplings and red cabbage with apples. It smelled delicious. "Here's your dinner. If you don't eat up there won't be cake but rainy weather tomorrow."

As if it had ever happened before that there were leftovers. Zoro couldn't remember Luffy ever not eating everything he could get his hands on. Watching the cook balancing the last two plates, his own and Zoro's, over to the table he could tell that he the alcohol would hit him quite hard the moment he sat down. His superior manners were slipping and he even forgot to dote on the ladies. Zoro didn't know him that well but he was sure he would never have included the ladies to the general 'morons' at the table.

"Whew," Sanji breathed when he sat down next to Zoro and now he could see it in the blonde's eyes that he was already quite drunk. His body had practically moved on autopilot.

"Remind me to not let you involve me in toasting before dinner ever again," he said and took a deep breath before facing Zoro. "You look way too sober. Does moss have special enzymes or something to not be affected by alcohol?"

"I don't think so," Zoro replied not really keen on picking a fight with a drunk.

"But I've decided one thing," the cook added and a little grin spread on his lips. "The sober guy does the dishes."

"That's awfully far-sighted of you," Zoro replied not really bothered by the cook's decision. It was just a statement of what had always been the case. The sober ones did the dishes. It was the only reasonable thing to do if you didn't want to buy new dishes after a party.

"I'm a genius when it comes to seeing the big picture."

"Just shut up and eat, shit-cook."

"Don't insult my cooking!"

"I didn't. I was talking about you."

-X-

Right after dinner Zoro could hear the ringing of the cook's cell. He was really an important guy considering how many times he had been called today. Lighting up a cigarette Sanji got up from the table to take the call. After eating dinner his movements had become a little steadier again, Zoro noticed.

"What is it, geezer?" he snapped right after answering.

"The hell? Is that a way to speak to his elders?" the reply was yelled and it was loud enough to be easily heard by Zoro when Sanji sat down next to him again.

"I was brought up by rude bastards. I don't know another way of speaking," Sanji replied and puffed out a cloud of smoke.

"Don't gimme that shit! I wasted more than nine years listening to your nonsense trying to teach you at least basic rules of courtesy and some cooking skill so you could make a living. And what for? Everything you cook tastes like rotten garbage!"

"Why are you bothering me, old man?" Sanji asked and Zoro wasn't sure if he was aggressive due to the alcohol or if their relationship had always been this strange. But the next things the other man said were unusually quiet so Zoro couldn't hear them.

"Who told you stupid shit like that?" Sanji yelled and now everyone was staring at him more or less interested. "Show me the one to force me to do anything I don't want, old fart, we'll see if you succeed! No, I mean it! There is no way I… Whatever. Think whatever the hell you want."

"Don't whatever me! You ungrateful brat!" the other yelled again. "You'll be here tomorrow morning and explain everything properly!"

"Like hell, damn geezer!" Sanji yelled and hung up. He finally seemed to realise everyone was watching him. He smiled. "Zeff says Merry Christmas."

"That sure as hell didn't sound like Merry Christmas to me," Usopp stated and Zoro couldn't agree more.

"He just called to tell me to come over to the Baratie tomorrow," Sanji explained now fully grinning.

"I don't see that!" Usopp insisted, "That sounded more like 'Next time you show your face here you'll be dead'."

Luffy finally started laughing. "Sanji, I want to go there, too!"

"You still owe Zeff a new roof, don't you?" Sanji stated matter-of-factly and raised an eyebrow to emphasise his words.

Luffy pouted. "That's not the point. I want to eat his food!"

"Do as you please, Luffy. Oh, and Zoro - he wants you to come along, too," Sanji said with a mischievous smile on his lips. Zoro looked at him trying to figure out what he was trying to hint at.

"So?" he therefore asked.

"That's no fair! I want to come along!" Luffy ranted but was ignored.

"He mentioned that Ivankov visited him to tell him about my new situation and that involved mentioning that I was living with you, marimo head," Sanji explained lowering his voice. "He didn't spare him the details, if you know what I mean."

Zoro wasn't sure if he did but it didn't really make a difference, though, since he wouldn't go anywhere tomorrow. It was the first day of Christmas after all. Plus, if the cook had trouble with his dad it was his damn problem, Zoro decided. He had bothered with the blonde's matters enough for one day. There were more important things to… and then it hit him. The 'details' the cook was talking about must be the pictures of them kissing this morning and their kiss on the phone earlier. It was no wonder Zeff wanted to talk to him if Ivankov really had told him about _that_. Damn.

"I don't see me explaining _that_ to your dad," he therefore stated.

Chopper tucked at Zoro's sleeve and looked up at him with big eyes. "What are you going to explain to Zeff?" he asked and Zoro frowned.

"I'm not going to explain anything, Chopper. It's the cook's damn problem to talk to his dad."

"You should help him, Zoro. That's what friends are for," Chopper insisted and Sanji couldn't suppress a soft snort. Judging by the amused look on his face he was really enjoying the situation.

"That's damn right. You have to help your friends, Zoro," Usopp agreed with Chopper causing Zoro to frown. Judging by Usopp's heavy lids he was still as drunk as he had been before dinner.

"Do you even know what we are talking about?"

"Sanji's job?" Usopp guessed and couldn't have been farther from the truth.

"What makes you think this is about his job, moron?" Nami asked disbelievingly.

"But he's working for Ivankov, isn't he?" Usopp asked scratching his head. "I want another beer. Sanji do we have more beer?"

"Like hell I am working for him!" Sanji burst out, "Our contract terminated at midnight and I don't want to hear his shitty name ever again!"

For Zoro the cook was making a drama for no reason-which was reason enough to inquire him about it.

"Oi, shit cook," Zoro spoke up to get the blonde's attention, "What were you doing at Ivankov's?"

"Didn't I tell you just now that I don't want to hear that name again?"

"Don't be a sissy and tell me what your job was."

Sanji looked at him with a confused frown. "I was working as a cook. What else would I work as? Are you stupid?"

"I was just wondering. Are you sure that's all there was?"

"No, that was not all there was," Sanji muttered before he burst out laughing. "It was so fucked up I don't even want to think about it."

"Iva-chan is a nice guy," Luffy butted in squeaking happily.

"He's the frigging queen of okamas!" Sanji burst out as if that fact was the worst thing he had ever come across. Maybe it was, but Zoro couldn't make sense of it.

"Okamas?" he therefore asked. Maybe Ivankov really was the queen of some small country he hadn't heard of so far?

Sanji sighed in disbelief and rubbed his face with his palms.

"Okama means…," he took a deep breath, " all of his subordinates are a little odd. And with odd I mean freaks. And with freaks I mean shitty perverts. Just like Tibany and Caroline."

That was all Sanji said before he rose to his feet and collected the dirty dishes to take them to the kitchen for wash-up.

Whatever had happened to the cook must have deeply agitated him to make him react as hostile as he did when it came to Ivankov. Not that Zoro cared but it was strange enough to spark his interest. If it bothered the cook so much to even think about it, it sure as hell held high potential to tease him about it. But he needed more information for that so he rose to his feet and followed him to the kitchen. Leaning against the door frame he watched Sanji prepare the hot soap-water to wash the dishes. It was interesting how mad he seemed even when Zoro couldn't see his face. His movements were swift and sharp, yet a little unfocused, just as if he were fighting drunken while trying to suppress his boiling anger. Maybe, if Zoro managed to push the right buttons, he could get the cook to snap and fight him.

"Tell me, cook, does it bother you that those okamas are cross-dressing?"

"No." Sanji replied taciturn without bothering to turn around.

"Is it because they are gay?"

"No."

"Because they are not pretty enough to suit your tastes?"

"No!"

"Did they feel you up?"

"What the hell? Why don't you leave me the fuck alone and bother your friends with your presence?"

Finally Sanji turned around and it was not just fury blazing in his eyes. He looked embarrassed and uncomfortable. Zoro smirked at him. It wouldn't take much more to get the cook to snap.

"Hit a sore spot, didn't I?" Zoro pushed further and all fighting spirit left the cook at once. Zoro wasn't sure if he had overdone it or what the hell just had happened.

"You just can't leave me alone, can you? If you insist on disturbing me, there's no helping it but at least be useful and dry the dishes, moss head."

"Will you tell me what I want to know?" Zoro asked and grabbed a tea towel to do as the cook wanted. Showing a little gratitude for tonight's dinner wouldn't kill him. Plus, he got the chance to bother the cook further.

"I don't think so but if you can offer me something worth talking about the worst time of my life I might consider it an option."

Zoro thought about it while drying the tableware.

"I don't think there is something I could tell you in exchange. I don't remember doing anything I hated."

"Maybe I can help you remember, swordsman-san," Robin offered and when Zoro turned to face her he knew exactly which incident she was talking about. The tell-tale smile on her lips was more than he needed to remember the only secret he shared with her. It was the most embarrassing moment of his life. It held nothing heroic, nothing honourable and not even a tiny bit of grace. Zoro clenched his teeth and felt his ears getting hot.

"No. That's a story I won't talk about and you promised to not talk about it either," he snapped but it was too late already. Luffy started questioning Robin about the memory they were talking about, Usopp started fantasizing about possible events that could have taken place and Brook was asking if it had something to do with panties. Zoro sighed.

"That's precisely why I won't talk about it. Do you understand that now?" Sanji asked in a low voice and Zoro looked at him.

"But I still want to know what happened," he insisted in an equally low voice and the corner of the cook's mouth turned upward.

"I'll tell you if you tell me your story first," Sanji whispered and waited for Zoro to react while washing the dishes as if nothing had happened.

"You can not tell anyone about it no matter what, got that?" Zoro growled in defeat.

"Same goes for you - if I find your story interesting enough to tell you mine."

"It's the most embarrassing episode of my life. I'm sure it's worth getting to hear your story," Zoro said putting down the towel and straightening his back. His head was starting to ache and he was sure this was the most stupid idea in his life but there was no way back now.

"Fine. If it really is worth laughing about I'm happy to share my ordeal," Sanji replied and dried his hands on the tea cloth Zoro had just put aside before he fumbled a cigarette from the pack and lit it.

"Alright. And hopefully your story is worth making a fool of me as well." Zoro took a deep breath and started telling his story in a low voice, "We went shopping in a town I can't recall the name of. Somehow we got separated and I ended up at an orphanage."

"I wonder what happened then," Sanji mused and a broad smile graced his lips.

"I somehow ended up feeding a baby and it peed on me but that wasn't the worst part. Heaven knows why but I found myself carrying three babies around with me while doing the shopping -after the lady in charge of the children had removed my dirtied shirt and forced me to wear a ridiculously tiny yellow shirt with an pink print stating 'mama'. Do I need to say more?"

Sanji just looked at him and blinked. Then his smile grew even wider before he burst out laughing.

"Tell me more. Please, it is just so awful. Hahaha!"

Zoro's face was burning with embarrassment but it was nice to see the cook laugh. Even if it was about him.

"Zoro, what happened?" Luffy asked and hopped on a barstool at the counter, curiously looking at Sanji. "Why is he laughing?"

"I talked to him and now he's laughing like an idiot."

"I want to laugh to. Tell me what you told him!"

"I'm sorry but it's a secret. I can't tell you."

"Bushido-san is right. If it's a secret he can't tell you, captain-san. But I'm sure if the time comes he'll tell all of us what's going on," Robin said and Zoro wasn't sure what she was talking about. It was nothing new for him to not get what she was talking about but this time it felt different. Almost as if she knew something he didn't-even though he was supposed to. It was creepy how she always seemed to know things no one else did.

"Alright," Luffy replied. "But I want to be the first to know when the time comes."

"Whatever you want, Luffy," Zoro said and nodded in Robins direction to show his gratitude. "Now get back to whatever you were doing and have fun. We'll be with you in a minute."

"I want to play hide and seek!" Chopper exclaimed and ran off to hide.

"Yay, hide and seek. Usopp has to look for us!" Luffy decided and ran upstairs to the dojo to hide.

Nami rolled her eyes and Zoro had to admit that it was the only possible reaction. Turning his attention back on Sanji he found the blonde watching him, a smirk was still gracing his lips.

"You are such a moron for wearing that stupid shirt. Even if a beautiful woman asked you to wear it."

"She was an old hag."

"All the more reason to decline. Still, I won't let you badmouth a lady ever again. Remember that," Sanji said still smiling but Zoro could very well see that he was serious about his statement.

"Shut up, cook. I'm not here to listen to your babbling about women. I'm here to hear your story."

Sanji just shook his head and picked up washing the dishes again. "Which one is it?" he finally asked. "Shall I shut up or tell you my story?"

"Tell me your damn story!" Zoro growled feeling the urge to strangle the blonde before him. Hopefully, he wouldn't have made a fool of himself for nothing.

"I think I need a drink when this is over," Sanji said and handed Zoro a plate to dry it. "Well, you know about Ivankov and his okamas. When I got there I didn't know shit and blinded by expectations that weren't justified I thought they were real women."

Zoro snorted but suppressed it as soon as he noticed that it hadn't been the punchline yet.

"As soon as I realised my mistake I started running but they caught me and insisted on keeping me around. So, to get Ivankov to teach me his cooking skill so I wouldn't be there for no reason at all, I had to play by his terms."

"And his terms were?"

"They made me wear make-up."

"Nice."

"I had to wear pink pumps, too."

"I'm sure it was horrible to watch you teetering around in them."

"And they stuffed me into an incredibly ugly, frilly, pink dress. With puffy sleeves."

Zoro tried to imagine it and could only shake his head. It was so uncool he couldn't even laugh about it.

"Why don't you say anything?" Sanji asked cautiously but didn't dare to look at Zoro. It was endearing to see him so embarrassedly touch his neck without even noticing that the foam from his hands was now sticking on his hair and collar.

"I don't know what to say. Weren't you the one to tell me to refuse wicked getups just now?"

Sanji started laughing again. "That's damn right. I do know what I'm talking about from first hand experience, after all."

-X -

It felt great to be able to laugh about the things that had bothered him for almost two years now. Being with Zoro took a weight of his shoulders of which he had thought he would have to carry alone for eternity. Never would he have expected it to be so easy to talk about what had happened at Ivankov's place. And what he had expected even less was that Zoro had actually told him about his ridiculous babysitter episode. It was hilarious and Sanji was grateful that the moss-headed moron seemed to trust him enough to share this experience with him. All he could hope for now was that Zoro would keep his word and not tell anyone about his inglorious days as an okama.

"Did you grow that wicked French beard of yours before or after having found out that you fancy dresses?" Zoro asked and cocked an eyebrow to emphasise his question.

"Afterwards, asshole. I need a drink now and the company of lovely ladies," he said and left Zoro behind in the kitchen to not have to look into his gleefully gleaming face anymore. So, thinking about it again, Sanji came to the conclusion that telling him about Ivankov had been a mistake.

He went to the dining room and sat down next to Nami and Robin who were smiling at him.

"You look troubled, cook-san," Robin stated tilting her head to the side.

"It's nothing your love for me can't cure, my beautiful butterfly. Seeing your and Nami-swan's lovely faces is enough to make me happy again."

"You mean you are crappy, shit cook," Zoro interrupted him and sat down opposite of his friends, two bottles of beer in his hands. One of them he placed in front of the cook.

"You forgot your drink," he muttered and took a sip from his bottle.

Sanji was about to say 'thank you' when Usopp, Chopper and Luffy burst through the door to the rooftop garden.

"Sanji, we want cake!" they exclaimed in unison.

"You can't bear the thought of giving me a minute of rest, right?" Sanji asked smiling and got up again to serve the cake. It always pleased him to serve his friends and they knew he wouldn't mind it. Plus, the cake was amazing and he simply had to watch their happy faces while devouring it.

He took the cake from the fridge, lit the candles he had put on top of it and placed it on the dining table so Chopper would be able to blow them out and make a wish.

"I hope you'll enjoy your cake, Chopper. Now make a wish," he said and stepped aside to make room for the kid.

Chopper stared at the cake in awe, his eyes glistening with pure joy. He took a deep breath and blew out all the candles in one go.

"What did you wish for?" Luffy asked and popped up right behind Chopper, most likely to make sure he would be the first to ensure his fair share of cake.

"You can't tell your wish or it won't come true!" Usopp butted in and for a moment Chopper seemed utterly shaken and on the verge of tears by his mishap of almost telling his wish.

"Listen, Chopper," Zoro suddenly said drawing all the attention, "If you don't tell you wishes they can't come true because no one knows about them. You could at least give us a chance to help you make your dreams come true, right?"

Chopper smiled his most adorable smile at Zoro before starting to wiggle in his place and insult his friends.

"Don't think your caring about my wishes makes me happy, moron. I won't tell you that I wished for all of us to always be together."

"If that ain't a super wish worth making a toast on I don't know what is," Franky said and raised his glass. His friends followed suit. "On Chopper," he said.

"On Chopper," the others said in unison and downed whatever drink they held in hand.

Unfortunately, Sanji felt it go straight to his head, causing him to feel even more drunk that he had before dinner. It was not like him to be affected by alcohol so much but today sure was an exceptional day in more than one respect.

"What's wrong cook? Are you drunk already?" Zoro asked and Sanji looked at him slightly confused. Was he drunk? He contemplated the question and came to the conclusion that he was. Definitely. Why else would his attention slip to the earrings dangling from Zoro's ear like Christmas tree balls? Well, they were odd balls since they were tear shaped, but hey, why not? He smiled stupidly and decided that it was not the best way to end this conversation but the most reasonable one to just go and take a nap. Five minutes and he would be as good as new.

"I guess I am," he said and raised the knife he had brought with him to finally cut the cake. The cake sort of started flowing over the table and Sanji wasn't sure if he would be able to catch it. "Man, this is hard," he sighed and with an annoyed grunt Zoro rose to his feet and stepped behind him, placing his hand over the cook's.

"Damn it, cook, it's just a cake. All you have to do is this," he growled and lead Sanji's hand towards the cake and helped him cut it. Zoro was warm against Sanji's back and somehow it made the effect of the alcohol worse. Sanji's head started spinning and he needed to close his eyes a little and rest. He pulled out his hand und Zoro's, turned to face him, wrapped his arms around his torso and rested his head in the crook of his neck. A moment later he was fast asleep.

\- X -

Zoro didn't get it. The cook had been drunk, yes, and obviously more than Zoro had thought but that didn't explain why the moron had fallen asleep standing right beside the dining table.

"What the hell?" he voiced his surprise and laid an arm around the cook's back to prevent him from accidentally falling over. Looking at his friends in question he found them equally stunned. "I guess this hasn't happened before."

"Not really, bro," Franky said and started laughing. "But it is super funny."

"Thanks to this we'll be able to make fun of him for ages," Usopp agreed and Zoro was glad they didn't consider making fun of him as well. At least they didn't consider it yet.

"I guess, Mister Cook was up all day and working really hard to prepare this party and he's simply worn out."

"Sounds reasonable," Zoro mused and suddenly he felt guilty for coming home in the middle of the night without considering… Wow, hold it. He hadn't even known somebody would be living here so it wasn't his fault the idiot cook was tired. And as drunk as a lord from just a couple of drinks. "I'll take him to bed," he decided and poked the cook in the cheek. "Hey, moron, wake up and go to bed."

"Zoro!" Nami yelled and Zoro looked at her raising an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Can't you just let him sleep and carry him to bed. It's not like you are a wimp and he weights a ton. So just do it or I'll raise your interest and you know you already owe me more money than you are worth.

"Since when do I owe you money?"

"Shut up and take him to bed already!" she shouted and Zoro gave in without another word. Sometimes this witch was more than he could handle. Looking at the cook for a moment he contemplated simply throwing him over his shoulder. But then again it was very likely that Nami wouldn't like this idea so he picked him up bridal style and decided to simply not think about it.

He carried Sanji over to the bedroom and laid him on the bed without really considering the guest room an option. When he wanted to pull the blanket over him the cook opened his eyes a little and mumbled, "Hep me 'ndr'ss," before his eyes closed again.

Zoro didn't understand a word of it. Still, when the blonde tried to open a button of his shirt he could imagine what the other wanted.

"Oh, come on," he mumbled unhappily but still helped the cook to get rid of his necktie and dress-shirt. Admittedly, it would be really uncomfortable to sleep wearing these and Zoro wasn't sure if he would be able to explain it if the cook managed to strangle himself with his necktie in his sleep-so undressing him most likely was the lesser of two evils.

At least it was until it was time to undress the lower part of the cook's body.

"Mmh mh," Sanji mumbled when Zoro hesitated and drowsily kicked him in the side. It hurt. It really did and Zoro smiled in appreciation. Being able to hurt him in one's sleep wasn't something that happened often.

"Okay, okay, I'll do it!" he said before removing Sanji's shoes, he wasn't even sure when or why the freak had put them on, and his socks. His feet looked ordinary, still they were part of the insane power the sleeping moron held in his legs. It was almost disappointing.

When he finally removed the slacks he didn't really have the time to study the cook's legs before he pulled the blanket over himself and nuzzled his face into the pillow.

"And now?" Zoro asked himself and glared at the slacks in his hand. They didn't reply.

"Why don't you come back and join us for drinks and a piece of cake, Mister Bushido?" Robin asked from the door and smiled at him in her unique and utterly unfathomable way.

"Sounds sensible," he said placing the slacks on the bed and followed her back to his friends.

-x-

The next morning Zoro knew something was wrong the moment he awoke. He had been alone when he had gone to bed but he felt another body being pressed against his, soft breaths puffing against his back and strands of hair tickling the back of his neck. It was a tall and firm body, masculine. Most likely Sanji's. Wait.

The cook's arm was slung around Zoro's upper body and his hand was resting on Zoro's chest, his fingertips were slowly drawing circles on his skin.

What the hell was going on here and why did he have the cook in his bed? He listened to the cook's breaths, trying to figure out if he had accidentally woken him up. They were slow and steady. The warm skin of the cook was moving against Zoro's back every time he breathed in.

In a very weird way it felt nice.

The cook moved a little and suddenly his lips were brushing against the skin between Zoro's shoulder blades. They felt soft and cool, just like his hands.

A strange feeling spread in Zoro's chest. It reminded him of riding a rollercoaster. It made him feel uneasy but excited him at the same time. This was in no way how it should be. Slowly he slipped out from under Sanji's arm. He didn't understand what was going on but he knew he needed to get out of the bedroom as quickly as possible.

His heart beat incredibly hard against his ribcage when he went over to the wardrobe and hastily picked underwear, a pair of grey tracksuit trousers, and a dark blue tank top before he left the bedroom and hurried to the bathroom.

He closed the door and locked it as soon as he entered the bathroom. His heart was still thundering in his chest. Resting his back against the bathroom door he tried to calm down and make sense of what just had happened. He couldn't. He had never been weak to pleasure so why were these slight touches affecting him so much? He pushed himself off of the door and slipped out of his underwear. Maybe a shower would help him clear his mind.

Yet, this time it was only making things worse. The warmth of the water did nothing more than to remind him of the warmth of the cook's body. Memories from when he had pressed the cook against the bedroom door, grinding his groin into his body, and conquering his mouth, appeared before his mind's eye. It was wicked.

Cursing under his breath he turned the cold water on and hoped he could wash away excitement which was gushing over him. He needed to clear his mind and focus. Whatever had caused him to sleep with the cook-next to the cook in the same bed, he corrected himself-had to be a one-time thing. He was not supposed to develop feelings of any kind for the cook, except for friendship. And this weird fluttering in his chest felt like everything but plain, platonic friendship.

-X-

When Sanji had awoken he had felt a little hung over. He had kept his eyes shut and his breath as steady and calm as possible to get used to the situation when he had noticed the soothing warmth he had been nuzzled against. Searching through his memory for any hints that he had not gone to bed alone hadn't led to success. He hadn't been able to recall any detail about how he had gone to bed either.

He had tried to focus on what he felt being pressed against his body to figure out what had been going on. He had taken in the sensation of hot skin and the scent of another person. Unmistakeably, it had been Zoro in his arms but it hadn't been this fact that had freaked Sanji out. What had made his heart skip at least one beat was that he really wanted to touch the other man even more, to taste his skin. He had absolutely no idea how or why things had turned out like that but he had known that if Zoro had awoken then and noticed he had been awake as well and hugging him like his favourite teddy bear he would have been in deep shit.

It had felt surreal and he hadn't been able to stop himself from starting to slowly move his fingers in tiny, unsteady circles on Zoro's chest. Of course, he had noticed the change in Zoro's breathing, the surprise it showed. He had known he should have stopped but hadn't been able to. Somehow, oddly enough, it had aroused him-even if just a little.

The urge to taste Zoro's skin had become overwhelming and he had moved a little so his lips could examine another part of Zoro's unexpectedly soft skin. It had sent butterflies rushing through his stomach.

He had felt Zoro slip out from under his arm and then he had left in a supressed hurry.

Sanji could only roll on his back and wonder what the hell was wrong with him. He had never been attracted to a guy before and now he was acting like a weirdo. Why the fuck had Zoro been in his bed anyway… Oh, in _his_ bed. Of course, Zoro would have went to his bed to sleep in just as Sanji most likely had. They sure as hell hadn't thought about the end of it before. Force of habit was a strange thing. Damn it.

Sanji needed a smoke.

He got up and prepared a change of clothes for after he had taken a shower.

He needed to look splendid for work and decided that a cigarette and a cup of coffee were an absolute necessity before that. Maybe it would help him to become his old self again without such unnecessary feelings. And of all people it had to be the brute he had a thing for. Great.

He left the bedroom to brew coffee just to find Usopp and Chopper sleeping on one couch as well as Brook and Franky on the other ones. They were really lucky that Zoro had such a huge apartment.

-X-

Stepping out of the bathroom dressed and calmed down again Zoro could smell freshly brewed coffee. He turned to see the cook looking up from the newspaper-a cup of coffee in his hand-and cracking a smile at him. It was a miracle to Zoro how he could have gotten rid of the mess all of them had caused yesterday in a couple of minutes.

"Good morning, marimo. You don't really want to go and meet Zeff in this ratty outfit, do you?" he asked.

"Whom? I didn't plan on going anywhere today," Zoro replied confused. Had he missed something again? Sanji just shook his head.

"The old geezer. He called yesterday and demanded to meet you," and when Zoro still showed no sign of understanding he added, "The guy who screamed at me for what felt like forever over the phone? Because Ivankov showed him certain pictures of a certain sous-chef and his live-in _boyfriend_?"

Zoro didn't like the way the cook emphasised that, but it did the trick to make him remember. Looking down on his attire he didn't see any mistake in it, though. He would even go there wearing a hessian sack. Life was no runway, he was no model, so why bother? Furthermore, he didn't need to impress anyone since he definitely was no boyfriend or something alike.

"I think this outfit is just perfect," Zoro stated and finally went over to the kitchen. "Is there more coffee?"

"Sure. Help yourself," Sanji said and folded the newspaper to a neat rectangle before he got up and emptied his cup of coffee in one long swallow. "I need to take a shower and you need to get changed. This outfit stinks and I won't take you to a restaurant like that."

And with that he was gone, leaving Zoro alone with his coffee and doubts about his getup. What the hell was wrong with him? He didn't need to get changed just because some drama-queen wanted him to.

"Damn it," he cursed and went to the bedroom to do as he was told. He didn't need this. But he didn't need another argument in the morning as well. He slipped on simple black trousers. If that didn't satisfy the cook he couldn't help him. He wouldn't wear a shirt or even a suit just to meet someone's father. If he had wanted to propose he might have considered it an option, but he didn't. At least this was something he could decide on his own. Which got him to thinking whether he had always been this easily bossed around.

Waiting for the cook to get ready he decided that it wouldn't hurt to leave a note to his friends-just in case they had forgotten where he and the cook were supposed to be by now as well. Looking at the clock in the kitchen it was a miracle to him that Sanji's cell hadn't rung already. It was quarter past ten. They were late.

He poured himself a cup of coffee and slowly sipped it, enjoying the strong and bitter taste of it. The coffee he had drunken before had never tasted like this. Maybe he had bought the wrong blend? Maybe he would ask the cook about that later.

The sudden ringing of Sanji's cell startled him and he nearly spilled his coffee. Damn this damn busybody calling now. He didn't understand why people needed cells anyway.

"Hello?" he said picking up Sanji's phone since the caller ID showed _old geezer_.

"Who is this and why are you picking up the little eggplant's phone?" the caller snapped.

"My name's Roronoa Zoro, pleased to make your acquaintance. The cook's taking a shower and I thought your call might be important so I picked up," Zoro explained and strolled over to the bathroom. "Please wait a second," he said before knocking at the bathroom door and shouting, "Oi, shit-cook, your dad's on the phone. Hurry up and get your ass dressed, I'm not your secretary!"

The door was yanked open and Sanji glared at him. The towel around his waist started loosening and destroyed the entire effect.

"For fuck's sake, can't anything go right this morning. What does he want?" Sanji hissed and hurried to fix the towel.

"Ask him yourself, 'cause-like I said-I'm not your secretary."

"Please do me the favour and ask him while I get dressed, shit-head," Sanji hissed and disappeared in the bathroom again without closing the door.

Zoro sighed.

"So, ahm," Zoro had forgotten Sanji's last name and the name of his father as well. Damn. He couldn't call him geezer, could he? "Sir, why are you calling?"

Zoro heard Sanji's laughter from the bathroom.

"It's Zeff, boy. Not Sir. I just wanted to tell the brat that he's late," Zeff replied and Zoro could hear amusement in his voice.

"He sais you are late," he transmitted the message to Sanji.

"I know that myself!" Sanji replied and came over to Zoro half dressed again, glaring at him. "Now guess whose fault that is. It took you ages to take a shower."

Zoro felt caught but tried his best to keep a blank expression.

"He said he's very sorry and unworthy of being your son," Zoro translated Sanji's statement and Zeff roared with laughter in response.

"You shitty liar! I never said that!" Sanji protested but Zoro didn't care.

"He said he's sorry for his poor cooking skills and will try his best to improve soon," Zoro translated again and slowly but surely found the idea of being the cook's secretary not that bothersome anymore.

"Tell him I'll be waiting for him," Zeff replied still laughing and hung up. Zoro just looked at Sanji.

"What?" Sanji demanded angrily when Zoro handed him his phone. But, really, Zoro didn't want to say anything. He simply enjoyed the moment.

It was nice to see the cook a little flustered.

"Nothing. I'm just looking," Zoro finally said after a while and noticed that he really was sizing the cook up. Being half naked sure made that easy and since he was awake now and not trying to hide his body, Zoro figured that it was alright. Unexpectedly, the cook was just a little less muscular than he himself was. The suits sure hid that well. He had looked almost skinny in his suit two years ago. But fighting with your legs was bound to require strength in your torso and a flexible body. Thinking about it he wondered what Sanji's skin would feel like if he touched it now. And then he wondered where that thought had come from.

"Look somewhere else, moron, this is not a peepshow," Sanji snapped and slammed the door shut.

"Can't you be quiet? My head is gonna 'xplode," Usopp mumbled and Zoro realised that they weren't alone. He had completely forgotten about his friends and that they had spent the night here.

Hadn't he been doing something before the cook's cell had rung?

Strolling over to his cup of coffee he saw a blank sheet of paper and remembered his plan. He wondered what to write except for 'good morning'.

He settled for a simple 'the cook and I are at his dad's restaurant. I'll ask him to bring food for you'. He didn't think there were more questions to be answered.

"What a shitty note," Sanji remarked looking over Zoro's shoulder. Zoro knew he had an exceptionally neat handwriting so the cook had to talk about the content of the note.

"Stop nagging and get your sorry ass to work before they decide to kick you out again."

Sanji took a brown winter coat from the wardrobe in the hall and looked at Zoro expectantly who just threw over his dark green coat and tied it with a dark red sash.

"Are you serious?" Sanji asked and frowned at him. "That thing sure as hell is not warm."

"No, but my keys are in its pocket."

The cook didn't reply anything. He didn't have to. Zoro knew exactly what he was thinking. He could read it from his expression that he thought Zoro was a hopeless nutcase .

Zoro just shrugged it off. He didn't need warmer clothing. End of story.

Stepping out on the street, Zoro realised it was freezing cold outside. It didn't bother him, though, but he finally understood why the cook thought he was a freak. He could see his breath freezing in the air in small white clouds. It wasn't his favourite time of the year, since he preferred autumn to all other seasons, but he liked the quiet and calm of frozen winter landscapes. They seemed to slow down time and cleanse the air. And even though he would never admit this little fact as well, he was enjoying the festive vibe coming from every house they passed by walking down the pavement towards the Baratie. He wasn't really fond of fancy Christmas decorations but he could feel the happiness behind them.

The minutes passed by in amiable silence and soon he could see the Baratie-and the shadow of a tall figure leaning against the wall next to its entrance. Coming closer he recognised Law and a deep frown appeared on his face. If Law was around it sure as hell meant trouble in one way or another. It irritated Zoro a little that Law didn't have Kid with him, since he couldn't remember ever seeing him without his lapdog. Sanji didn't seem to be bothered though, which was worrying Zoro on an entirely different level. Why the hell was it nothing out of the ordinary for the cook to have a warlord lingering around at his father's restaurant? Not that Law was a threat or anything like that but he wasn't the clientele restaurants were usually looking for.

When they were close enough to talk to each other Law pushed himself off the wall and stepped in their way, politely greeting them.

"Good morning and Merry Christmas, Zoro. Sanji." he said smiling. "It must be fate that both of you show up just when I wanted to talk to you."

"Good morning, Law, and Merry Christmas to you, too," Sanji replied stomping out his cigarette on the pavement. "It's rare for you to show up outside of your realms. What happened?"

Zoro just nodded towards Law to greet him.

"Nothing happened. At least nothing worth talking about. Not yet that is. But I need you to do me a favour, Sanji. But I can't explain the details right now, as you can imagine. After all I'm involved in things I'd rather not discuss out in the open."

"What favour?" Zoro asked warily. This wasn't about him but since Sanji was living with him he was responsible for him. To a certain extent. Somehow. A little. Maybe. What the fuck? This had nothing to do with him.

Law scrutinised him for a while before he answered, the smile never leaving his lips. "It's good to see you are fine, Zoro. There are interesting rumours about you having a certain blonde chef living at your place."

"What's it to you?" Zoro asked not really knowing what Law wanted to imply.

"To me this is essential. You don't intend to kick him out any time soon, do you?" Law asked with genuine interest and Zoro didn't know why information like this would mean anything to him.

"Not really. But why do you care?"

Law didn't pay attention to him anymore but focused on Sanji. His gaze lost his mild interest and turned into a pinning glare.

"I need your help and I will get it at any cost," he stated.

"But how am I supposed to help you? I'm just an ordinary chef," Sanji said but Zoro knew exactly that the cook was not just a chef. He was much more. He was a badass fighter, just like all of Luffy's friends. Luffy had a knack for making friends with strong personalities and incredible abilities, be it fighting or whatever came in handy.

"I need you to support my alliance with Luffy," Law started explaining without really explaining anything.

"If you already have Luffy at your side, I don't see a reason why you would need me," Sanji replied coolly and lit up another cigarette. Zoro thought the same. If Luffy was supporting Law's actions he and the cook would do everything in their might to support Luffy.

"Things aren't that simple to handle this time. I'll explain the details later but first tell me one thing: Are you and Zoro dating for real?"

Zoro was dumbfounded by that question. Why the hell would Law care about something as that? And how the fuck could he even know about their _situation_?

"How do you know about that?" Zoro asked without waiting for Sanji to react. He wouldn't have reacted anyway. He looked completely shocked by Law's question.

"It wasn't that hard to figure out when I heard Zeff screaming into his phone last night. Kid and I were here for dinner and, well, eavesdropped on it."

"This is not happening, is it?," Zoro said and pinched the bridge of his nose. He had been rather glad that Zeff hadn't yelled the details of his rage into the phone yesterday but Zoro would never have imagined that he had yelled across the entire Baratie. Damn it!

"Listen, Law, it's not as simple as that. Actually, Ivankov somehow managed to get snapshots of me... kissing Zoro-why it came to this is a long and unpleasant story. Anyway, he showed the pictures to Zeff," Sanji finally said after regaining his composure again, "And that led to a severe misunderstanding on his side."

Law's eyes flashed with glee when he heard that.

"That's just perfect," he said. "I would have loved to have come up with such an extravagant plan but life often surpasses your imagination, doesn't it?"

"I don't get a word you are saying," Sanji hissed, slowly getting angry and stomped out another spent cigarette on the floor. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Law was still smiling when he finally answered the crucial question: "The favour I need from you is to convince everyone the relationship Ivankov set you up in is real."

"But why?" Sanji demanded to know lighting up another cigarette. "Give me a good reason and I will think about your idea before rejecting it."

"Like I said, I'll explain everything later, but I'll tell you this: Doflamingo is involved, I am, Kid is, Ace is, Luffy-and it would be really nice if Hancock were as well. "

"Sounds like one hell of a party to me," Zoro said and tried to figure out the meaning behind the names mentioned. Dealing with Doflamingo alone was enough of a reason to need all the help one could get but it didn't explain why Zoro would have to date the cook for it. "But why would you need us to be a couple for that?" he therefore asked.

Sanji sighed. "Because of Hancock, right?"

"Exactly," Law agreed. It didn't make sense to Zoro, though. "She hates your guts, Sanji, but she agreed to accept your company if I could prove her opinion of you wrong. It was like fate when I heard that you suddenly turned gay. And putting two and two together it only left Zoro to be your chosen one."

"Fate, huh?" Sanji mumbled grinding his teeth into his cigarette.

"I need all the help I can get-and I can't go without you because Luffy wouldn't be happy about it. But having you on board would cause Hancock to refuse her help. And having you in a stable relationship with a guy sounds like the perfect proof that you are not just a perverted jerk, right? So, what do you say?" Law asked.

"I don't mind," Zoro replied and Sanji's head snapped in his direction, eyes wide in surprise.

"What?" he breathed in utter disbelief.

"I don't mind acting your boyfriend," Zoro repeated and he meant it. Whatever was going on and causing Law to practically beg for Sanji's help was enough for him to consider it a serious problem. And he wouldn't stand there watching. What bothered him was that it didn't sit right with him to be all to willing to agree to this scheme. On the contrary, it caused his abdomen to tingle in excitement when he thought about it, which was pissing him off. Still, he tried not to show it. He needed the cook to agree to this as well and he would get nowhere when the idiot thought he was mad at him.

He didn't take his eyes of Sanji for even a second. He could see the thoughts racing in his mind and suddenly he wasn't so sure about his decision anymore. The longer it took the cook to make up his mind the more Zoro regretted giving in to his whim. But then finally a mischievous smile appeared on Sanji's lips, and a wave of relief gushed through Zoro's veins.

"Fine," Sanji said and looked Zoro straight in the eye. "But I have one condition: I'll tell Zeff we are lovers but _you_ will have to convince him I'm not bullshitting him. If you can't do that, the deal's off-and believe me, I won't make it easy for you. I have a reputation to defend."

"Whatever. I don't give a damn anyway," Zoro replied and Sanji nodded. So they had a deal. And he was _not_ happy about it. Definitely not. A smile spread on his lips.

"I just hope you don't regret this because I won't go easy on you either."

"Bring it on, moss-head."

"You bet I will, shit-cook."

"I really don't want to disturb your chitchat, but…," Law interrupted them obviously amused, "thank you. I owe you for this."

"You don't have the slightest clue how much you owe us, Law," Sanji said, "How about we discuss this at dinner? I still insist on getting a _very convincing_ explanation."

"I'll be there," Law replied. "And I'll bring Ace along."

"Ace?" Zoro asked perplexed. "Why is he here? Isn't he on the run?"

"That will be part of the explanation. I think Sanji's father is already about to run rampage because you are extremely late by now."

"Damn it, I completely forgot about the geezer," Sanji hissed and stormed off.

Zoro just watched him leave. How in the world had this morning developed like this? When he had left the house everything had been just fine and now he had willingly gotten himself a boyfriend. The fuck? He would _never_ be able to explain this to anyone, let alone his somehow-father-in-law-to-be.

"Care to join me for breakfast?" Law invited him and Zoro just nodded and followed him inside. He would prefer booze over breakfast but that would most likely be the worst first impression possible. And he wouldn't bring shame over himself just like that.

Law sat down at a table in the back of the Baratie where Kid was waiting for them. He was obviously bored out of his mind while bending his tea spoon in various ways.

"Finally," he welcomed Law back. "All this waiting was starting to make me want to kill someone."

"You succeeded in killing the spoon," Law replied smiling again. Zoro wasn't sure if he had ever seen another expression on his face. He either looked neutral or was smiling. There was no anger or anything like that in his expressional repertoire. Or he was simply beyond such low emotions.

"You are awfully funny as always," Kid commented and looked up at Zoro. "You are late. Did you get lost on your way here?"

"Like hell got I lost. I was talking to your _boss_ ," Zoro replied knowing it would piss Kid off. Kid didn't like being considered a subordinate, no matter how true it was.

"Oh really? So, are you dating Sanji or what?" Kid asked brushing off Zoro's attempted insult grinning mischievously.

"We'll see," Zoro replied not really willing to discuss such matters with the redhead.

"I told you two years ago that it would end like this. You should have asked him out back then instead of disappearing. It would have saved us lots of trouble."

"I wouldn't say that," Law butted in. "I have high hopes in the improvement of both your skills over the last two years. They should be worth my patience."

Zoro thought about their words and it surprised him that he could actually remember Kid's remarks about being in love with the cook back then.

" _What the fuck are you saying?_ " a voice yelled on the upper floor and a moment later the door to the kitchen crashed open as Sanji's body hit it. The sheer momentum caused him to fly over the banister and directly towards their table.

"Or not," Kid commented Law's statement rolling his eyes when Sanji landed on their table. It was a miracle he didn't break it but jumped right back up towards the upper floor with just as much as causing a soft thud. Grabbing the banister he yanked himself over it screaming "You shitty geezer!"

Zoro just stared in awe. The landing had been flawless and he was sure he would have simply destroyed the table crashing into it. Furthermore jumping up to the upper floor was a nice move in itself. It wasn't something ordinary people did. The urge to challenge Sanji for a battle gushed over him again and caused his fingertips to prickle. It had only been one and a half day since he had last fought someone but he already felt the lack of adrenaline in his blood.

"Oh, look at our lovesick puppy," Kid teased but Zoro didn't bother answering. The screaming in the kitchen went on but he wasn't sure if anything else except for 'shitty geezer' and 'What the fuck?' was said. It didn't sound like it.

"Looks like you'll have to explain a lot to his father," Law finally said when the noise died down.

"I never expected anything else," Zoro said. "After all, giving me hell is part of our deal."

"I always knew you were masochistic," Kid stated, finally breaking the tea spoon. "Oops," he commented it.

"Oi, marimo, Zeff wants you up here," Sanji shouted from the upper floor, a satisfied smile on his lips.

"Wish me luck," Zoro said rising from his seat. "I'm sure I'll need it."

He took his time ascending the stairs, since he still had no idea what to say to Zeff. Setting eyes on Sanji's smug smile as he gestured him to enter the kitchen he knew something was odd. But that didn't stop him. He opened the door and stepped inside.

He knew the kick was coming before he even set eyes on Zeff in the kitchen. The older man's wooden leg hit the side of his head hard enough to show the man's skill and power-but it wasn't enough to make Zoro flinch, though. He only stared at the huge moustache poking out from the older man's face and his huge chef's hat. It was, well, extraordinary. If not to say ridiculous but he wouldn't allow himself to think so poorly of his fake-father-in-law-to-be.

He heard the other cook's in the room gasp for air watching what just had happened.

"This can't be," one of them breathed dumbfounded.

"Told you so," Sanji said coolly and brushed Zoro by to enter the kitchen as well, a content smile gracing his lips.

"But to be completely unaffected by the boss's kick-even you can't do that, Sanji," another one of the cooks said and Zoro could see a vein pop on Sanji's forehead before he lit up a cigarette.

"That's not the point," Sanji said and puffed out a cloud of smoke.

"Is that really why I had to come up here? So I could get kicked in the face?" Zoro asked rather annoyed. This was not really what he had imagined meeting Sanji's dad would have been.

"You are here because I wanted to meet the little eggplant's _boyfriend_ face to face," Zeff said. He sounded quite uneasy to Zoro but he couldn't figure why.

The cook's in the back of the kitchen started whispering to each other. Well, whatever. It didn't matter to Zoro.

"You still believe that shit, owner?" one of them spoke up. "Sanji, for fuck's sake tell him you don't go for guys!"

"I don't go for guys, still I fell for Zoro," Sanji declared and the sincerity in his voice did not just startle his colleagues. Zoro had never been confessed to before but this just felt like the real deal. A disturbingly pleasant warmth spread in his stomach and a tiny smile appeared on his lips.

"Don't grin like an idiot, say something!" Sanji demanded cocking a curly eyebrow at Zoro before kicking him in the shin. What the fuck were you supposed to say when you were being confessed to? Thank you? That was unlikely.

"I truly appreciate your feelings and hope I can prove to be worthy of them," he finally replied in his most humble kendo-champion-manner. But what surprised him the most was that he really meant it. This was a disaster since he was supposed to just act the lover and not to fall in love for real. But right now he was just a little bit moonstruck.

Everyone in the room just stared at him in silence until Sanji couldn't bite back his laughter anymore.

"You are so adorable," he gasped between fits of laughter. Zoro felt truly humiliated. Adorable was a word he had never heard in a description of him. And he wasn't sure he wanted that to change. It felt wrong on a fundamental level. Maybe it was due to the fact that the idiot-cook was laughing at him.

"Fuck you, asshole!" he snapped and lashed out at Sanji. Sanji dodged it but Zoro could grab his shirt nonetheless and shoved his back roughly against the nearest wall, forcing all the air out of his lungs and effectively cutting off his laughter.

"I'm being serious here," he hissed but Sanji just smiled at him, highlighting the silence around them. Zoro could practically feel the stares of everyone around them.

"That is your most adorable feature," Sanji finally whispered and grasped Zoro's face to pull him in closer. Zoro hadn't know the cook could be so gentle. His kiss felt like silk running over his skin but it was over way too quickly.

"Now, let go of me, I need to go and serve the customers," Sanji demanded back to his usual self.

"Who said you can go anywhere, little eggplant?" Zeff asked now deeply frowning. "I want answers. Haven't you always been head over heels for every woman who was unlucky enough to cross your path? What the hell happened?"

Zoro finally realised he hadn't even said hello to his supposed-father-in-law-to-be. Damn. But he had been greeted with a kick in the face so it should be fine.

"He happened," was all Sanji had to say to that topic.

"That's not an answer!" Zeff yelled and Zoro could understand that only too well. If you wanted to get answers you were better off asking someone else. Or Zeff and he were just too plain stupid to ask the right questions. Still, Zeff managed to finally make Sanji lose his cool and burst out in anger.

"I fell in love! Is that so hard to understand? If what you saw of him so far isn't enough to convince you _please_ you do me the favour and at least try to get to know him and you'll understand! He is shitty amazing!" he yelled and stormed out of the kitchen leaving a shocked Zoro and his deeply frowning father behind.

Zoro didn't know what to do. Again. Slowly but surely this was getting a habit whenever the blonde cook was involved. He felt the stares on him once again and this time he could feel his ears getting hot. This was embarrassing and he could feel his cheeks turn hot.

And finally Zeff started laughing.

"I've never seen him like that before," Zeff said after having calmed down again and something that could have been a smile appeared beneath his moustache. "And now get your lazy asses back to work!" he yelled at his employees before turning to Zoro again. "You don't seem to understand what's going on with him as well."

"Not one bit. But it doesn't matter. It is what it is and I'm fine with it," Zoro admitted. It was scary that he really meant it. He was fine with their entire situation. Maybe even content and the more he thought about it the less it freaked him out. Zeff opened the kitchen door and motioned for Zoro to follow him outside. The older man rested his arms on the banister and let his gaze wander over the guest room until it finally settled on Sanji sitting next to Law, facing Kid who was laughing heartily at Sanji's unhappy expression.

"So, for how long have you known each other? He told me you'd explain everything to me."

"We only met thrice over the past three years. All in all I'd say I've known him for about thirty-six hours-and that's just because I came home thirty two hours ago and found him residing at my place," Zoro explained and even to him it sounded ridiculous. Nevertheless, Zeff seriously thought about that before he asked his final question.

"How can you say you're in love with him then?"

"I never said I was. But I can't say I'm not either. I don't understand it myself. He's just so..." Zoro was at a loss for words. How could he describe someone he barely knew to his father without sounding like an idiot? So he decided that he had nothing more to say. Talking about his personal fear of being willing to completely submit himself to someone was just out of the question. That was something he would never admit out loud. He wouldn't accept these feelings without fighting them. It would be a fierce battle and he already had a notion he would lose it, but that wouldn't keep him from fighting. A smile spread on his lips and he shook his head in surrender.

"The word you are looking for is 'intense'," Zeff interrupted his train of thought. "Boy, you are just as stupid as he is. Why don't you take him home to figure out the obvious yourselves without annoying the fuck out of me?" Zeff said and suddenly he raised his voice to yell at Sanji.

"Don't you dare show your mug here again until January little eggplant! I've had enough of your bullshit already! And take this besotted idiot with you!"

… **.xxXxx…..**

 **I'm sorry to disappoint, but that was it for now. I hope you've had fun. I would really love if you'd tell me your opinion on this chapter or the story as a whole so far. Thank you! Yours, Sanni-O**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter five - Oh, my God**

 _I fell in love! Is that so hard to understand? If what you saw of him so far isn't enough to convince you please you do me the favour and at least try to get to know him and you'll understand! He is shitty amazing!_

For Sanji this day couldn't get any worse. Sanji hadn't really meant to snap and blurt out something outrageous as that. He hadn't really meant to say anything. His plan had been to let Zoro do the embarrassing part-and here he was, the prince of dumbass kingdom, jumping the gun and practically forcing his fucked-up thoughts on everyone he knew, without even admitting them to himself beforehand. He didn't want to know that he might like Zoro for real. Well, he _did not_ , for fuck's sake! Still, having said it somehow turned it into a fact.

Having reached the end of the staircase he nearly fell over his own feet as today's morning's events popped into his mind. His subconscious was screaming homo at him for molesting Zoro in his sleep. It was screaming liar at him for pretending it hadn't happened and for pretending he hadn't enjoyed the sensation of it. And here he was, calling himself a homosexual in front of everyone. Kissing Zoro in front of everyone had been a really bad idea as well. He would never be able to live this down.

Clenching his teeth so hard it hurt he stomped over to Law's and Kid's table and slumped down on the seat next to Law's. He was furious, angry at himself and desperately searching through his mind for a sufficient excuse for what he had done. He couldn't find one.

"Went that well, huh?" Law asked mildly smiling. Honestly, if there hadn't been customers around Sanji would have ripped Law's very guts out for causing him to willingly make a fool of himself.

"You fucking doomed me!" Sanji hissed maliciously. He needed to vent his anger-it was what he had always done. It was his nature.

"Doomed you? How come?" Law asked surprised and Sanji could feel his ears getting hot. Of course Law hadn't done anything, but having him around just felt like a bad luck charm.

"I just blurted out some fucked up shit I would _never_ have said if you hadn't asked for this shitty favour. This is all your fault!" Sanji was growling by now but he wouldn't cause a scene. Not twice a day. He could hear Zeff's laughter roaring from the kitchen and in this very moment he was sure he would never be able to live this down.

"What exactly did you say?" Law questioned on and his politeness and honest worry soothed Sanji into telling the entire story hurriedly in a quiet voice. Sanji made sure no one could hear him except for Law and Kid, who immediately burst out laughing.

"Fuck you, asshole! It's my shitty life you are laughing about," Sanji snarled but Kid's laughter still eased the tension a little.

"I would've loved to see Zoro's face when you said that," Kid gasped between fits of laughter.

"You did well, Sanji," Law added much to Sanji's surprise. But the neutrality of his voice couldn't cover the amusement glistening in his eyes.

"Thank you. I still feel like the idiot of the year. Believe me, it takes a lot to make me feel embarrassed when it comes down to spouting on about love and shit but this is the worst possible outcome. I only hope it is worth it," Sanji said and let his forehead sink down on his arm, which was resting on the table, in defeat.

"That's a pity. You just missed Zoro's confession," Kid suddenly said and Sanji raised his head again. Kid was watching something on the upper floor. "You guys are so sweet I swear I'll get caries from it."

"What confession?" Sanji asked but was cut off when Zeff suddenly yelled, "Don't you dare show your mug here again until January, little eggplant! I've had enough of your bullshit already! And take this besotted idiot with you!"

Sanji's head snapped in Zeff's direction just to see him standing at the banister, casually leaning on his underarms. Zoro was looking at Zeff just as confused as Sanji felt. After a few quiet words Zeff exchanged with Zoro he suddenly kicked his butt yelling, "Now get that eyesore out of my place!"

Sanji was dumbfounded. It was obvious that Zeff had taken a liking to Zoro. This couldn't be happening, right? The grumpy old fart had seriously taken a liking to his _boyfriend_. They had been approved.

"Holy shit," Sanji breathed palming his face before he started laughing.

"What's wrong?" Law questioned puzzled.

"The geezer likes him," Sanji explained after calming down a little, a satisfied smile on his lips.

"I don't see that," Kid stated frowning at Zoro who made his way over to them.

Looking in the same direction Sanji noticed that Zoro didn't really look happy, more like he was lost in thought.

"I have absolutely no clue what just happened," he said when he arrived at their table.

Sanji could feel his heart leap a little. He had already assumed he was a little smitten with Zoro, but having Zeff supporting his feelings-in his own crazy way-was helping to finally admit it. To himself. No one else was supposed to know. Like hell he would tell anyone that he was falling for Zoro for real.

"I'll explain it on our way home," Sanji said smiling and rose to his feet. He felt the urge to touch Zoro, who was frowning at him. "Don't think too much about it. Else the moss on your head will rot." Sanji poked his index finger on Zoro's forehead, causing his frown to ease a little.

"I'll be right back," Sanji finally said and went upstairs again to get his coat. He had almost forgotten about that damn thing.

"I thought I told you to leave already, little eggplant," Zeff stated when he entered the kitchen once again. This time he had lost his bite and was finally his calm self Sanji admired so much. It reminded him of the proud pirate Zeff had been when they had first met. He owed it to Zeff's strong will and their shared dream of finding an Ocean called All Blue, where the entire variety of fish of the world could be found, that he was still alive and able to look into his adoptive father's face. He loved him, his grumpiness, his harsh ways of teaching, his yelling - it was what had made him the man he was now. Still, he hated being called little eggplant.

"I forgot my coat, geezer," he replied smiling. "Or do you want me to freeze my arse off on Christmas?"

"I don't care but your boyfriend wouldn't like it, I guess."

Sanji smiled and grabbed his coat. This situation hadn't lost one bit of its bizarre nature. He knew he would be crossing a line and he knew that he would be doing it in front of everyone but he just couldn't hold back. He pulled Zeff into a tight embrace.

"Thank you so much, Zeff," he whispered and maybe for the first time in his life he could feel a rough patting on his back. It would be the closest of an embrace he would get from his 'dad'.

"Now get the hell outta here, little eggplant. Oh, and take this with you," Zeff said slightly flustered and pointed towards a cardboard box filled with take away boxes of food. "We can't let your little friends starve."

"Like I would let that happen."

Sanji slipped on his jacket and took the box before he left. Christmas was a wonderful time. The most wonderful time of the year.

-X-

Zoro found himself hating Kid's company more and more. Ever since he had come downstairs the redhead was mischievously grinning at him without saying a bloody word. It was pissing him off. Law just sat there smiling at him with mild amusement. It wasn't really making him feel better.

"What the hell's so funny?" he growled without really expecting an answer.

"The two of you are unexpectedly entertaining," Law said and waved the waiter over when he passed by to order another cup of black tea. He seemed to truly enjoy himself. Zoro wanted to hit him in the face.

"I'm just doing what you wanted."

"No. This is way better," Kid butted in. "Though I found your 'flaming love confession' a bit disappointing."

"I was not confessing anything," Zoro stated and crossed his arms in front of his chest in defence. In his opinion this conversation was taking the wrong turn.

"That's why it was disappointing."

Zoro had had enough. He wouldn't confess feelings he didn't have to the object of his supposed desire's dad of all people. This simply wouldn't be happening. It would be so unromantic, uncool and unfair to do so, he couldn't even stand thinking about it. Shit. Was he really thinking about fancy shit as romance? No way. He wasn't even sure if he knew what romance was. Let alone how to be romantic. He would ask the cook about that later.

"Be glad you know that much because I won't tell you shit about this anymore," Zoro declared and left. He would wait for the cook by the staircase where he wouldn't have to see Law's and Kid's faces any longer. It bothered him enough that he would have to see them again at dinner. At least Ace would be there, which meant he would have to invite at least Luffy as well. He was taking a mental note to not forget about it.

Slowly but surely he was getting impatient. Why the hell did it take so long to get a coat from the kitchen?

Looking up the staircase his gaze met a fully packed Sanji balancing a cardboard box down the stairs. This was definitely not a coat.

"What is this?" he asked when Sanji had arrived at the bottom of the stairs.

"Food in a cardboard box," Sanji replied shoving the box into Zoro's chest. Zoro frowned at it before finally taking the box in his hands.

"Why did you get it?"

"Because a certain moss-head promised to a certain meat guzzler that we'd organise breakfast. We can't go home empty handed."

"Oh, right," Zoro murmured. He could be glad the cook hadn't forgotten about it-like he had. And one other thing came to his mind. "I'm sorry," he added.

Sanji looked at him in surprise and lit a cigarette. "What for?" he questioned.

"For fucking it up. With your dad I mean." Zoro couldn't help but feel bad about it. He hadn't really been able to keep his part of their agreement. He had promised to convince Zeff he was dating Sanji for real but he just hadn't been able to say it. Love, that was. He couldn't possibly be in love after knowing someone for barely three days. At least that was what he thought. And Zeff had pretty clearly shown that he wasn't really happy about their supposed relationship. He had greeted him with a kick and had kicked his ass goodbye. That was quite definite, wasn't it?

"You didn't. Zeff really likes you," Sanji said. Zoro couldn't believe it.

"He has a strange way of showing that," he therefore said. Sanji shrugged his shoulders and went over to the exit. Zoro followed him.

"That's how I was raised. You get used to it," the cook finally said and held the door open for Zoro.

"It's no wonder you are such a freak."

"Says the freak."

They left the Baratie and headed home. The sun had broken through this morning's clouds and shone on them with warmth Zoro hadn't expected. It was still awfully cold, though.

He was following the cook without asking but he wasn't sure if he was going in the right direction. Zoro looked around trying to figure out which way they would have to take to get home. He saw neat houses, colourful decorations and blinking fairy lights - in every direction. There was no way he would be able to tell north from south. This damn city was a maze where the streets moved whenever you didn't look. It was annoying.

"What's with that stupid face?" Sanji suddenly asked next to him.

"I was just thinking," Zoro replied but he wouldn't point out the fact that the streets were out to trick him. The cook did neither ask nor say anything. He just looked at Zoro with an unreadable expression.

"So, we're officially dating now," Zoro concluded the events of the morning without really intending to. But he had nothing smarter to say anyway.

"I think so," the cook replied flicking his spent cigarette butt on the floor.

"What do I have to do then?" Zoro asked serious concern in his voice. This was supposed to be his first relationship so he couldn't afford to fuck it up. It would be like losing a fight-and that wouldn't be happening. But he needed information. You couldn't fight an enemy you didn't know, right? Sanji stared at him stupidly, blinking his eyes several times in surprise.

"Excuse me?" he asked.

"I've never dated anyone before," Zoro tried to explain his current problem. It wasn't really bothering him that he didn't know what to do, he just didn't want to cause the cook trouble.

"But it's common sense. You have to have at least a faint idea of how relationships work!"

It was strange to see the cook getting so upset about such trivial shit. Still he thought about his 'common knowledge' of relationships. He knew how friendship worked, he knew how to be polite with strangers but he only knew love stories from books and movies. And he wasn't really fond of them. Still he was sure it was what the cook would want from him. So he finally asked, "Is it like it is in books and movies?"

"That's about the size of it," Sanji said lacking the enthusiasm Zoro had expected. Yesterday when he had been around Nami and Robin he had practically preached love, swooned over them like there would be no tomorrow and annoyed the fuck out of Zoro. But… maybe this was where he could find the solution to his problem. Of course, he wouldn't turn into a babbling idiot spouting shit about love all the time like the cook did. But hadn't he been ranting on about flowers and shit?

"So, you want me to buy you flowers then?" he tried his luck with the first idea that came to his mind.

"Hell, no! I'm not a girl, moron." So this was not what the cook wanted? Zoro didn't get it.

"But you have flowers at home," he insisted but it wasn't helping much.

"Damn right. I can buy shitty flowers myself," Sanji stated and lit another cigarette. Somehow it seemed to Zoro that he was pissing the cook off.

"Want me to take you out to dinner?" Zoro tried the next idea coming to his mind. In every movie he had ever seen the couples had been out to dinner. This simply had to be a damn perfect idea.

"No! For fuck's sake! I can cook dinner myself!" Or not. Damn it, this was annoying. He was really trying hard to find a way to please this godforsaken idiot by not embarrassing him completely in front of everyone and all he got for it was a 'No, I can do that myself'. The hell?

"If you can do everything yourself, why don't you fuck yourself and we'll tell Hancock just that?" he snapped furiously.

Sanji looked at him surprised and shoved his hands deep into his pockets.

"Sorry. I didn't think this far," Sanji relented, a soothing smile appearing on his lips. "It's just-you don't have to do anything to please me. I'm fine as things are. Just do what you feel like. No one would believe a change in your attitude anyway."

"I see." This conversation didn't really help Zoro but at least he knew now that he didn't have to worry about it. Still he kept forming sort of a plan in his mind. If he couldn't please the cook, then he could at least try and be pleased by what he did himself.

When Zoro opened the door to his apartment he was hit by a smooth wave of warmth. Immediately his skin started prickling as it adapted to its surroundings.

Franky or Usopp must have lit a fire in the chimney and Zoro was grateful for it. He hadn't been cold before but cosy warmth was something he preferred to frosty winter weather. Though it would be perfect for a nice workout. Maybe he could train a little after lunch - and if things went really well he could get the cook to spar with him. That would be quite nice.

He only noticed that he had stopped in his tracks when the cook bumped into him.

"What the hell?" Sanji muttered right next to his ear, obviously trying to make sense of his sudden halt. Sanji's body was icy and the cold soaked through his coat; the mixing sensations of warmth and cold were causing him to slightly shiver. Still, it got him to thinking that maybe there was some other warmth as nice as the heat of a fireplace. The heat of a body clinging to his, skin rubbing against skin while… he was losing focus.

"Oi, did you die mid-step, marimo?"

The cook's breath was warm against Zoro's cold skin in the crook of his neck. It felt so tempting it made him want to throw the food box on the floor and shove Sanji against the next wall to kiss him, conquer his mouth and savour his taste... He needed to clear his head. Definitely.

"No. I was just enjoying the warmth," Zoro said and paced over to the kitchen, trying his best to keep his voice and face straight. This entire situation was affecting him more than he had thought it would.

"Yahoo! Zoro's got the food he promised!" Luffy cheered when he noticed Zoro and jumped from playing cards with Nami, Brook, and Usopp onto the kitchen counter. "What is it? What is it? Meat? Give it to me!"

"Hell if I know. Ask the cook."

"I don't know either," Sanji said suddenly appearing right behind Zoro, pressing his chest against Zoro's back again and cocking his head to look at the content of the cardboard box over Zoro's shoulder.

Now that he wasn't wearing his coat anymore a soothing warmth radiated from his body. Zoro had been right. The cook's body warmth was equally pleasant as the heat of fire. That was until he noticed Sanji's hand on his hip. The pressure was just enough to be noticed, but just to know Sanji's hand was there was enough to make his heart beat a little quicker.

Furthermore, it reminded him that convincing Zeff of their 'love' had just been the first step for them to take, which left telling their friends about their relationship as the next step before they would ultimately face Hancock. Damn.

To keep himself busy he took the food boxes from the cardboard box and placed them on the worktop.

"What are you doing at home already, Sanji?" Nami asked taking a seat next to Luffy, who sat on top of it.

"Zeff just wanted to talk about working conditions face to face. Like me having the next few days off. I think I deserve a vacation every once in a while, don't you agree, Nami?"

Nami looked surprised and it took Zoro a moment to realise the outrageous love confessions Sanji normally plastered all over Nami were missing. Yesterday he had been practically worshipping the ground she had walked on and now there was nothing. He was interacting perfectly normal with her. What the hell?

And then Zoro felt Sanji's grip on his hip tighten. It wasn't enough to be considered a bother but Zoro got the message. More or less. The cook was supposed to be his lover, so he wasn't allowing himself to flirt around anymore. That was nice. A smile appeared on Zoro's lips, just to add to Nami's confusion as it seemed.

"Of course, you do," she replied not really knowing what was going on.

"Would you care for a cup of tea?" Sanji suddenly asked no one in particular and took a step back from Zoro. He went over to the sink and filled the kettle with tap water without waiting for a response. Zoro could imagine only too well how much the cook needed distraction by now.

"I'd love to get a cup of black tea, Sanji," Brook replied.

"Me too!" Chopper chirped, "With lots of sugar!"

"Do you have punch?" Nami finally asked.

"Punch with cola would be super!"

Zoro found the idea of punch with cola disgusting. Punch in itself was unbearable if it wasn't laced with alcohol. Preferably rum. Rum sounded nice. Maybe he could ask the cook for a glass of grog.

He finished unpacking the cardboard box and glanced at the clock in the kitchen. It was barely past noon, way too early for a drink. Even he knew that, even though it wouldn't have bothered him if he had been alone.

"Don't you want anything, marimo?" Sanji asked him without turning to face him.

"Nah, I'm not into tea. And I know where everything is-or at least where it should be-because…"

"I know, this is your home," Sanji interrupted him and looked slightly pissed.

"No. It's our home. I wanted to say 'because I live here as well'."

"That's so romantic," Brook sighed and Zoro snapped "Shut up!" at him.

"So you do know what romance is, moron," Sanji smirked.

Zoro frowned deeply at him. He didn't get where this simple statement of facts could be considered romantic.

"If stating the facts is what the two of you consider romantic, then you are the morons," Zoro voiced his thoughts.

"Do you remember what I told you earlier today about your earnestness?" Sanji suddenly asked and Zoro didn't immediately know what he wanted. Had they talked about earnestness at all? He stared at Sanji as if the answer to his question would somehow appear on his forehead in neon letters. Unfortunately, it didn't. Zoro was sure he hadn't heard someone use the word earnestness in ages. No. They hadn't talked about something as that.

"Come with me for a second," Sanji said and brushed Zoro by to leave for the hallway. "And Luffy, don't touch the food. If even one crumble or a drop of sauce is missing when I return you won't be allowed in here when Ace comes over for dinner."

"Ace will be coming over? When?" Luffy asked joyfully.

"I'll tell you later. Now I need to talk to the moss-head."

"So mean! I want to know all about it now!" Luffy pouted but to no avail. Sanji practically ignored him while patiently waiting for Zoro to make up his mind if he would come and talk to him or not.

Zoro couldn't think of anything the cook could want to talk about. He wasn't even sure if he had ever done as much talking as in the last two days in his entire life. He decided on finding out what the cook wanted and followed him to a door in the hallway of which he wasn't sure if he had ever seen it before. Had they built a new room in his apartment? Why would someone do something as that?

When Sanji opened the door and stepped in. Zoro followed him - just to find himself in a small storage room.

"What the hell is that?" he asked. Sanji turned to face him and switched on the light before he closed the door behind them.

"I knew you were 'special' but this is ridiculous. This is a storage room, genius," Sanji teased but Zoro knew he didn't mean any harm. Furthermore, Zoro really had never seen this room before in his life.

"Did you and the guys build it while I was gone?"

"No! It was there from the very beginning." Sanji seemed slightly annoyed and a deep sigh escaped his throat but when he looked Zoro in the eye again there was a spark in his eyes promising mischief. "I didn't come here to discuss our apartment's layout," he said stepping closer to Zoro, which was really close in the narrowness of the small room. Zoro could already feel Sanji's breath brushing over his cheek. "I came here to give our friends a chance to figure out our relationship," he whispered into Zoro's ear. Zoro didn't get the chance to ask how in the world this fucked up plan was supposed to work. Hiding in a narrow room wouldn't explain… anything.

Zoro couldn't see what Sanji was doing, since he was on his left side, but he could feel it all the better. The tip of Sanji's tongue was wandering along the outlines of his hear, brushing over his ear rings down to his earlobe just to finally dip inside and brush against the tragus. It was making him shiver to feel Sanji's breath brush over the wet trail on his ear, to hear his steady breathing so close. He hadn't known his ears were so sensitive.

"You were so truly adorable just now," Sanji purred into Zoro's ear. Zoro didn't get it. There was no audience for Sanji's babbling so where was the point? He didn't remember doing something 'adorable' either. Zoro just growled in his throat as a reply. He didn't know what to say anyway.

"You don't deny it?" Sanji asked and looked at Zoro in question who finally turned his head a little to be able to see him. His fingertips started itching for the sensation of having the cook's skin beneath them and he wanted to taste his lips so badly it was close to torture to not just give in to his craving.

"I think no one besides you ever used the word adorable to describe me," he growled just to say something.

"All the better if no one knows about that quality of yours," Sanji stated smiling and let his hands trail over Zoro's chest up to his neck. They were still quite cold but it only intensified the sensation of the touch.

"You really like this boyfriend thing, don't you?" he asked when Sanji rested his hands on his shoulders and shoved him back against the wall. Sanji's smile grew wider and his eyes glistened when he replied "Dream on" before he kissed him. Even his lips were cold but when Zoro slipped his tongue inside Sanji's welcoming mouth he could feel that the blonde was almost burning up inside. Zoro noticed that he tasted different every time they kissed. Now it was slightly bitter, the taste of cold cigarette smoke. It wasn't particularly pleasant but it wasn't unpleasant either. Zoro just knew he preferred bitter to sweet, so it was just fine for him.

Without really noticing it, he pulled Sanji closer and wrapped his arms around his back. Sanji practically melted against his body, fitting it perfectly. Zoro knew he wasn't supposed to like what he did after what he had just said but, fuck, he did.

"Sanji, I want meat!" Luffy whined in front of the door of the storage room but it didn't bother the cook. If anything it made him more aggressive. He shoved his tongue in Zoro's mouth, challenging him for a battle Zoro too willingly accepted.

Zoro heard the door being opened. It didn't change a thing except for the cook grating his groin against his, a slight moan accompanying his actions.

"What are you doing?" Luffy asked but didn't get a response. After a while of most likely figuring out what was going on their captain decided on the only sufficient measure.

"Nami, they are ignoring me!" he shouted and barely a moment later the redhead was next to him.

"What the…?" she breathed and that was when Sanji finally seemed satisfied with the result of his actions. He slowly broke the kiss and whispered "You can let go of my ass now, marimo," into Zoro's ear, still not really caring about their newly gained spectators. Zoro hadn't even realised where his hand had wandered. The cook's butt was muscly, firm and perfectly shaped for his palm to fit around it. He wasn't really thinking about another man's ass now, was he? Reluctantly he let his hand slide higher to rest on Sanji's waist. He was not yet willing to let go of him as long as he wasn't sure how this situation would develop.

Zoro turned to face Nami and her surprise was slowly changing into something else he couldn't quite grasp.

"So it's like that," she stated and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I must admit, that I am a bit surprised."

"Nami, I'm sorry I didn't tell you but...," Sanji said and obviously didn't know what to say. He couldn't tell Nami a proper reason why he hadn't mentioned anything about their relationship before, since there had been nothing to talk about.

"I asked him to remain silent for a while," Zoro butted in and Sanji looked at him with big eyes. "We were busted already, so why not tell them?" Zoro asked and the always present smile reappeared on Sanji's lips.

"But why? Did you think we would make fun of your feelings?" Nami asked and Zoro frowned.

"No. I know you will, that's nothing to unsettle me. I just wanted to make sure I wouldn't fuck it up."

"Fuck up what exactly?" Nami asked, a glint of suspicion shining in her eyes. So she had noticed the cook's relieve. Damn.

"This love shit we have. I'm not really experienced in such matters, as you can imagine."

"Love? Who of you is on top?" Luffy asked innocently and Zoro could feel all the blood drain from his face. This was a question he might have expected from Brook, who was enough of a pervert to care about such things-but from Luffy? What the hell had happened to his friend in the last two years?

Sanji's cheeks were flushed with embarrassment just like Nami's had lost all colour. So they hadn't known that side of Luffy as well.

"We didn't think of things like that yet," Sanji stammered and a new devilish plan formed in Zoro's mind. If the cook wasn't willing to help him being a credible romantic, he would just do what the cook had told him: whatever the hell he wanted. This would be fun. He leaned in closer to Sanji and whispered in his ear, slightly startling him: "We could settle this with a fight. The victor gets to decide what he wants."

"Yeah, like you would…," Sanji tried to speak up but Zoro placed his index finger on his lips, effectively silencing him. He knew the cook was at least a little attracted to him since he had felt his arousal being pushed against his crotch just moments ago.

"Let me finish what I have to say. If you can beat me, I won't mind submitting to your every wish." Oh, this so did the trick. Zoro let his fingers slide down the cook's neck to feel his pulse. It had quickened so much it was almost impalpable. The cook gulped hard and then something Zoro would never have expected happened.

Ruby drops of blood started trickling from the cook's nose.

"Sanji, what's wrong with you?" Nami shrieked and a smug grin appeared on Zoro's lips. So the idiot cook really wasn't acting but had the hots for him. But who was he to talk? He really did mind submitting to anybody but it wasn't something he would never do when it came to the cook. In fact, he imagined it as very... satisfying. And now that he had said it out loud he couldn't deny it to himself anymore. It had become a fact. An indelible fact.

-X-

Sanji raised his hand to his nose and wiped over it just to look at if afterwards. He couldn't believe it. He was having a nosebleed. He was having a nosebleed from imagining doing unspeakable things to Zoro. Having the tall and proud swordsman submitting to him was turning him on so much, he couldn't even see straight anymore. His imagination was running wild and making him gasp for air.

He was shaking his head to get rid of the images of their naked bodies grating together, of Zoro's mouth on his skin, on his… he opened his eyes wide to be able to focus on something outside his mind, and fisted Zoro's shirt so hard with his other hand his knuckles turned white.

"Sanji, what's wrong with you?" Nami suddenly shrieked and Sanji found something he could focus on. His beloved Mellorine.

"I'm sorry, I was spacing out," he muttered and glared at Zoro. "Don't do that to me, asshole," he hissed.

"I didn't know it would have such impact on you," Zoro tried to justify himself.

"Nami, what are they talking about?" Luffy asked and started picking his nose. At least for him this story was getting old.

"I have no idea," she said. "You should let Chopper take a look at that."

Sanji looked down on his hand again. There was still blood trickling from his nose and inevitably dripping on his shirt. It was ruined. Shit.

"So now you owe me two shirts, dickhead."

" _WHAT?_ Sanji's bleeding?" Chopper shrieked in the living room and hurried over to check on Sanji the same instant.

"You need to go see a doctor!" he cried out hysterically when he saw Sanji's blood stained face.

"You are the doctor," Zoro rumbled and finally Sanji was able to get his act together again. A little. He stepped out of the storage room and as far away from Zoro as he could. This man was dangerous, he concluded. To get him all horny just from telling he would submit himself to Sanji's mercy. His heartbeat quickened again, causing another wave of blood to gush from his nose. This was embarrassing.

Sanji stumbled to the kitchen and got himself an icepack from the freezer. He wrapped it in a kitchen towel and placed it in his neck while he wiped his face with kitchen paper.

"Sanji, what the hell happened to your face?" Usopp asked when he saw him entering the kitchen.

It was the wrong question. The absolutely wrong question. Once again Sanji thought about Zoro, about making him kneel before him and shoving his… No. He had to pull himself together. He knew he was a little perverted but this was ridiculous.

"Zoro, I swear you'll have to pay for this," he growled in the kitchen paper he held pressed against his nose.

"Zoro-bro did this?" Franky asked. "I can't imagine it."

"I didn't do shit. I just promised him something. How the hell was I supposed to know it would excite him so much?"

"What did you promise?" Chopper asked but Sanji didn't really want Zoro to repeat it. If this went on like it had started he would die any time soon. Damn it.

"It's a secret," Zoro stated utterly unimpressed by what had happened. If anything he sounded amused and it pissed Sanji off.

He glared at Zoro over his kitchen paper and growled in his throat. He wouldn't say anything to that. He wouldn't accept being treated like that either. He would show this insolent bastard where his place was: It was right beneath him.

He sank to his knees and hoped he would die quickly. This situation was driving him crazy.

"I think I'm going mad," he sighed and Nami knelt down next to him, patting his shoulder.

"I can imagine that this is quite tough for you," she tried to soothe him and much to his surprise it worked. The want for Zoro was filling every cell of his body so that he was finally able to appreciate his Mellorine's worry as what it was. A wonderful proof of their friendship.

"Nami, could you please explain what happened?" Robin finally asked and Usopp, Franky, Brook and Chopper nodded in agreement. Naturally, they had no clue about what was going on. He could only hope that his beloved Nami-swan would tell them the news gently.

"Zoro and Sanji are dating," she stated the facts and Sanji bit the inner side of his cheeks to not scream out that this was not the point. This was about love, not stupid dating!

The room went silent and Luffy started laughing.

"They just don't know who's on top," he added to Nami's story and Sanji wanted to strangle him. This really was a topic not all of their friends needed to be informed about. For crying out loud, he had a right to privacy!

Sanji settled for looking at Zoro with a pleading look he hoped would get the moss-head to save the situation. Else he would commit suicide. This was worse than any torture he could think of. Worse than Tibany and Caroline kissing him-and he had really wanted to forget about that. Now it didn't really bother him anymore. Zoro glared at him and snorted before he spoke up.

"Listen, everyone, I don't really know how or why but the cook and I are..." Zoro paused and Sanji's fuse blew. Why the fuck was it so hard for the idiot to use the word love?

"We are in love, okay? Once and for all and no matter how ridiculous it sounds, we are in love. Got that?" he snapped jumping to his feet and instantly felt dizzy.

"Why can't you let me finish my sentence, love cook? I just made a pause for emphasis."

"You wouldn't have finished this sentence if your shitty life depended on it, frigid prick!"

"So this is love?" Chopper asked, his eyes sparkling with curiosity. "This is awesome!"

"I think this is a very special relationship, Chopper," Robin stated mildly smiling. "I'm looking forward to seeing you work it out."

"Thank you so much, Robin, that is really kind of you," Sanji said and suddenly found Zoro's face right in front of his. Staring at him, his expression just as frigid as Sanji had implied.

"So you want me to be less 'frigid'?" he asked dead serious and Sanji couldn't make sense of this question.

"No, I just… I…," he stammered. "It would be nice if you weren't so gruff all the time. That's all." It would be the last time he underestimated Zoro.

Zoro grabbed Sanji's hand, which was still pressing the kitchen paper against his nose and pulled it away. The bleeding obviously had stopped since Zoro tossed the paper in the sink without really thinking about it. He didn't say a word, but his gaze softened, mild amusement and affection shining from it. Then he slowly took the icepack from Sanji's neck, unwrapped it and took the wet kitchen towel to wipe the last remains of blood from Sanji's face, one hand gently holding his face in place while his other hand was wiping his upper lip carefully, as if Sanji were made of china. He was completely amazed and fascinated by what Zoro did to him.

"There," Zoro finally said and cracked a smile. "As good as new."

"Ahm, thank you?" Sanji whispered and Zoro stole a quick kiss from him. It was sweet and tender. But it was over way too soon.

"Happy now?" Zorro asked and couldn't suppress his smirk any longer. But Sanji knew the smirk wasn't directed at him but at their friends who were just staring at them in astonishment.

Smiling Sanji pulled the pack of his cigarettes out from his pocket and lit one of them up.

"I'm delighted," he said puffing out a tiny cloud of smoke.

"Is this really happening?" Usopp asked rubbing his eyes. "I swear they are telling the truth, but, how can this be?"

"He's right, Zoro, yesterday you wanted to kick Sanji out of your apartment and now you are telling us you're in love?" Nami questioned further.

Sanji was looking forward to hear Zoro's explanation, because he didn't have one.

"This is complicated," Zoro opened his spontaneous explanation. "See, I came home just to find the guy here who had me bothered for the past two years." He was turning to face Sanji. "Your ridiculous surrender was really, really annoying and I want compensation for that. I'll make you bleed for it."

"I'm looking forward to kicking your ass," Sanji countered and a mischievous smile appeared on Zoro's lips.

"I found myself attracted to him before I knew what was going on. Yesterday I thought getting him out of the picture would help me solve this problem but I was wrong, I guess."

"But how did you find out he was in love with you as well?" Chopper chirped overjoyed.

"Did you get to see his panties?"

"Can't you be serious for once?" Nami snapped at Brook and hit him in the head.

"Sorry," Brook apologised.

"Ivankov's subordinates helped us a little by chance," Zoro went on telling his story, "Yesterday morning they came here to-I don't know why the hell they were here-but they somehow tricked the cook into kissing me," Zoro explained twisting the facts so masterly Sanji had to toll his respect to him. This was fantastic.

"It was to protect you from being raped by them," Sanji interrupted him.

"Anyway, they took a picture of us kissing and I somehow ended up being blackmailed by Ivankov-and I used it to my favour to get to kiss him again-and when he bitched about it, I decided on kicking him out. That would have been the end of the story but..." Zoro paused and this time Sanji recognised its purpose and remained silent. "I'm glad Nami and Luffy butted in and kept me from doing something stupid. Yesterday, we talked a little and when Zeff called and screamed at the cook for not introducing his new boyfriend to him I knew my chance had come."

"The worst about it is that he didn't confess his feelings to _me_ so far but to my _dad_. I've never seen anyone struggle for words so hard in my life," Sanji added to their story and was glad they could keep it so close to the truth.

"So? It worked. You are mine. End of story," Zoro stated and it didn't sit right with Sanji.

"I'm not some shitty property, marimo!"

"I didn't say you were property. You are mine. That's a difference!"

Sanji sighed, unable to get the thought but it wouldn't change a thing anyway. "Call me what you will. We visited Zeff this morning to tell him about us and he was surprisingly fond of Zoro, so now everything's fine," he finished their story and he was glad it wasn't entirely made up. It wasn't really convincing either but it would have to be enough.

"You turned gay overnight, Sanji? I still don't believe it," Brook mused and he was damn right. "Personally, I think it would freak me out to find myself being into men all of a sudden."

"I've been fascinated by Zoro from the very beginning. I just hadn't realised that it was love. And believe me I was not really happy about it either."

That was all there was to say. Even their friends had run out of words.


End file.
